mornelithe_falconsbane: (Default)
2017-09-05 11:28 pm
Entry tags:

Trick or Treat!

It's the season of GHOSTS and spooky shit! Pumpkin spice and HAUNTED HOUSES! Scarves and SPECTERS OF HORROR! Full moons and THE LINGERING SPIRITS OF THE DEAD!

There's no better time of year to sit back and relax with a good book of GOTHIC GHOST STORIES like THE TURN OF THE SCREW or get Netflix going for THIRTEEN GHOSTS, CASPER, or THE WOMAN IN BLACK!

I love nothing more than a nice cup of HAUNTED white hot chocolate, a SPIRITED tale of love and soul-crushing HORROR, and a lovely artwork of GRIM LANDSCAPES inhabited only by THE DEAD and THOSE WHO SEE GHOSTS.

This is by no means exhaustive. Check my nonconathon, smutswap, and last year's ToT letters for more prompts if you need them.

General Wants: Ghosts, ghost sex, ghosts of dead parents looking after their children, exorcisms, time travel as a ghost, time travel in general, natural disasters, unlikely alliances, supernatural themes and creatures, haunted houses, animal transformations, super-dramatic weather, fall and winter themes, smut, non-con, dub-con, sex pollen, humour, crack, and ship fic between any and all requested characters

Genre/Format/Style likes: Standard fic style, ghost stories, horror stories, choose your own adventures (CYOA), interactive fiction, comics, fables, surrealism, PWP, fantasy, sci-fi, dreams

Stuff that you can include freely without asking me (art and fic): violence, gore, amputation of no more than one limb, implied underage that occurred in the past, torture, character death, necrophilia, pregnancy, body horror, incest, horror, murder, happy endings, unhappy endings, short fic, long fic, medium fic, the seasons of spring and summer (if necessary), everything/anything canon

DNWs: Disabilities, mental illness, sexuality, or gender as the focus of plot or used for drama. Feel free to include them, but not as a main plot (exception: descent into madness narratives are good fun, as long as they don't linger on the effects on the person's social circle or life). I don't like any variety of AU that I have not specifically requested, betrayals of trust, extreme/explicit underage (under 14-ish), or super grimdark edgy worlds (plots are fine, I just like the horror to be more horrible because it isn't normal/expected)

Genre/Format/Style dislikes: First and second person.

Requested Fandoms:
One-Punch Man
Original Works
Bungou Stray Dogs
One Piece

General Prompts (all fandoms):

- Ghosts!
- Nightmares crawling into the waking world
- Ghosts as evidence of soulbonds that were never fulfilled (that can be fucked back to life)
- Haunted houses!
- They went for a walk, and something awful followed them home
- This place is haunted
- Friendly ghosts
- Ghosts fucking with the living
- Ghosts fucking the living
- Opinionated ancestral ghosts
- Spirits of the dead
- They killed someone, and that someone followed them home
- Summoning the dead
- The lingering souls of the dead
- If they'd had a choice, they would have haunted someone cooler
- Moonlit spectres
- 72 hours to undo what has already been done
- Phantoms and Poltergeists
- Dead, not gone
- Ghastly undead spirits
- Curses
- Doppelgangers
- Silent Hill fusions

Art: I love winter/fall, eldritch glowing stuff, ghosts, freaky skeletal trees, night skies/moons, tarot themes and characters wearing disguises or costumes. I'm serious about the trees, btw. I really love pictures of trees.

I would love evil Disney princess interpretations of any of the characters I've asked for

Bungou Stray Dogs



Prompts )




Prompts )

One Piece




Prompts )

One Punch Man

Mumen Rider

Prompts )

Original Works



Catboy who sees ghosts
Cherry Tree with Bodies Buries Underneath
Sentient Haunted House
Escaped sex slave haunted by the ghost of former master
Half-Orc in search of an Honourable Death
Captain of the Ghost Hunter's Guild
Wizard's Test Subject
Tree Filled with the Souls of the Dead
Ghost Dog

Prompts )
mornelithe_falconsbane: (pic#11705029)
2017-07-01 03:25 pm
Entry tags:

Google Sheets: A Introduction to Useful Formulas

Link to Google docs Spreadsheet Tutorial 1

The first thing you need to know about Google sheets--and Microsoft Excel, for that matter--is that they are so much more than just a calculator or a spreadsheet. They are made to keep, store, organize, record, manipulate, locate and analyze data, and they are made to automate those functions. With sufficient effort and research, you can make a spreadsheet do almost anything for you.

So, if at any point you become frustrated and confused at why you're doing repetitive work to individual cells like some kind of loser who actually types things? You are probably not using your spreadsheet to its fullest capacities. Try Googling for a formula that does what you want. ;)

The second thing you need to know about Google Sheets is that their official documentation is fucking atrocious, but their help forums are fucking amazing. It's almost hilarious how unbelievably bad their official help is, and I say that as a warning: do not trust Google's help documentation to describe the full capacity of any formula. The stuff they do write up is probably accurate, but it's like Episode I of Star Wars--only the tip of the iceburg, and fairly confusing if you don't know a hell of a lot more context than you probably do.

Your Data

If you're reading this, I'm just going to assume that you're doing this for fandom reasons, and your data is 99% text. And not just text, but lumped together masses of text from an AO3 exchange .csv that you would like to organize in neat, tidy, and useful data.

CSVs = comma separated value. This is essentially a text file of spreadsheet data in which the columns are designated by commas and the rows are designated by paragraph breaks. Both Excel and Google Sheets should allow you to open a .csv file as a spreadsheet.

AO3 formats their .csv files like this:

Pseud,Email,Sign-up URL,Request 1 Tags,Request 1 Optional Tags,Request 1 Description,Request 1 URL,Request 2 Tags,Request 2 Optional Tags,Request 2 Description,Request 2 URL,Request 3 Tags,Request 3 Optional Tags,Request 3 Description,Request 3 URL,(repeats for all possible requests),Offer 1 Tags,Offer 2 Tags,Offer 3 Tags,(repeats for all possible offers)
Anonymo,, link,Fandom, Ships, Warnings, Character Tag, Freeform Tag 1, Freeform Tag 2, Freeform Tag 3,Optional Tag 1, Optional Tag 2, Optional Tag 3,The request from their signup in html,the link to their letter,Fandom, Ships, Warnings, Character Tag, Freeform Tag 1, Freeform Tag 2, Freeform Tag 3,Optional Tag 1, Optional Tag 2, Optional Tag 3,The request from their signup in html,the link to their letter,Fandom, Ships, Warnings, Character Tag, Freeform Tag 1, Freeform Tag 2, Freeform Tag 3,Optional Tag 1, Optional Tag 2, Optional Tag 3,The request from their signup in html,the link to their letter,~,Fandom, whatever else matchable criteria,Fandom, whatever else matchable criteria,Fandom, whatever else matchable criteria

When you spreadsheet-itize that, it looks like this:

PseudEmailSign-up URLRequest 1 TagsRequest 1 Optional TagsRequest 1 DescriptionRequest 1 URL(repeats for all possible requests)Offer 1 Tags(repeats for all possible offers) linkFandom, Ships, Warnings, Character tags, Freeform Tags 1,Freeform Tag 2,Freeform Tag 3Optional Tag 1, Optional Tag 2, Optional Tag 3, (and so on)The request from their signup in htmlthe link to their letter(previous three/four columns repeated)All matchable criteria for this offer 

As you can see, the csv conversion SHOULD make the distinction between a comma without a space after it (your column designation) and a comma with a space after it (text values inside the column.)

If it does not distinguish between them, your data will not line up with your headers (this makes it useless). If you don't have access to Excel (Excel makes this almost pitifully easy), then the fastest way to fix it is to open the .csv file in notepad, wordpad, or similar, and do a find/replace of all commas with spaces after them. Replace them with a weird piece of punctuation that is unlikely to be used in anyone's signup--# is good, as is % or ^. After you've saved the file, try opening it again in Google Sheets and it should work.

If you intend to make this spreadsheet public, your first step should always be to delete the columns with the participant's email addresses and their offers (highlighted in orange).That stuff is private, and you cannot keep it secure in a publicly available spreadsheet.

Now, to why AO3's exchange download is a load of fucking horseshit: those two cells with red text are in chronological order, as near as I can tell, and they cover every single matchable criteria a participant can enter. This means that it is impossible to split them into fandom, characters, media, ship, freeforms, and warnings based on their location in the list. That also means that the data (in that format) is worthless without a lot of manual effort on your part to parse, sort, and organize it.

The second reason is that it treats a requester's entire signup as a single row. This is hard to parse and even harder to search, especially considering how difficult to read the cells in red are.

That's where this tutorial comes in. I am a firm believer in clear, legible data that you can use (meaning it is searchable, countable, sortable, readable), and that's what this tutorial should show you how to do.

Today's Useful Google Sheets Formulas:



The first step in organizing your request (and offers, if you want to do the offers for your own purposes) tags is to split them into separate cells. The good news is that there is a formula that does exactly that--split.

Split separates all items in a list into separate columns based on a delimiter (a dividing character or set of characters). This is the same principle that the .csv file works under.

=split(text,delimiter,[split by each])

Text: what you want to split. Hypothetically, you could do this with actual text--something like "A, B, C", but you'll be using a cell reference 99% of the time.

Delimiter: The character (or characters) that separate items on your list. In this case, it will be ","

[split by each]: An optional TRUE FALSE command. If you set it to true and you have multiple characters in your delimiter category, it'll treat all of the characters as delimiters instead of all of the characters in that sequence as delimiters. If you put it in, use false. You are highly unlikely to need true.

Your formula will look something like this:


It will turn A2:

Fandom, Ships, Warnings, Character tags, Freeform Tags 1,Freeform Tag 2,Freeform Tag 3

Into this:

FandomShipsWarningsCharacter tagsFreeform Tags 1Freeform Tag 2Freeform Tag 3

How useful! However, there's one tiny issue with that output--leading spaces. Not an issue at this second, but it will be in the future. We could add a space to our delimiter in split, but I've never had very consistent results with that. So instead, let's use trim!


=trim(whatever you want to trim)

Trim is super easy. You stick it around anything where you want the leading and ending spaces removed from a cell. In this case, we want to trim the spaces off of the output of our split formula, so we put the split formula inside the trim formula.

=trim(= split(A2,",",FALSE))

But wait! This only gives us the first item from the list! How do we fix this?


You can use this formula with almost any other formula. It is the best formula I will teach you, and it is the most important formula. This is your "fuck typing that shit" formula. Your "impress your boss" formula. Your ace in the hole, your best friend, the finest formula known to man--you get the picture, right?

Anyway, Arrayformula. To nest whatever formula you just wrote inside arrayformula, hit ctrl+shift+enter. Or you can type it in. It's up to you.

Arrayformula calculates almost any formula and outputs a range. So our poor trim formula up there will not output a range, but if we stick it inside an arrayformula, it will!


Outputs our split array, trimmed, and it's all very convenient. But--is it convenient enough? (Spoiler, no)

The true glory of Arrayformula comes from the fact that Arrayformula will also calculate ranges. Say you want to split 300 rows of a column (which you probably do!). You could use our arrayformula with split and trim up there and drag it to fill 300 rows--or you could change your cell reference from D2 to D2:D300.


With that one, small formula, you just split and trimmed every single cell between D2 and D300. And you can use it for almost anything you would usually use individual formulas on! How fun!

mornelithe_falconsbane: (pic#11705034)
2017-07-01 01:42 pm
Entry tags:

Naruto Recs

My recs from the Tragic Magic Ninjas community on the late, lamented Imzy.

Visionary by esama - 61000 words (WIP)

A last desperate measure, last foolish hope, last chance. Of course it went wrong.
(It's your usual time travel fic and then it just isn't.)

Reccing a meme favourite, because it's honestly kind of fantastic.

Obito, Kakashi, and Naruto go back in time, and get stuck in one really weird body. Orochimaru, who it in his early twenties and creepy but not yet evil, is completely enthralled.

It's hilariously weird, and esama's commitment to the premise is exceptional. A++

(Also, there's Fanart. Lots of it. In case you were having difficulty picturing what Naoka looks like.)

Continually Adapting (to Stay Alive) by Ramabear - 7454 Words (Complete)

Shisui writes words to his soulmate, the one who never writes back, as if he were writing in a diary. Itachi sees him, tongue trapped between his teeth, as he works on a winding message that takes up both arms. It is lucky for Shisui that he is ambidextrous, Itachi thinks. It must not be so lucky for his soulmate though. Maybe it annoys them. They never reply to anything, but Shisui is stubborn.

Itachi’s soulmate always replies to him. Itachi draws birds with painstaking carefulness on his pale limbs. He gets grinning sharks in return, always. He wishes he could make them stay a little longer.

Kakashi/Shisui and Itachi/Kisame canon AU with soulmates.

Sweet, lightly angsty, and tiny Itachi and his giant Mist Missing nin Shark soulmate entertains me more than I can explain. (I'm going with 'Itachi and Kisame are soulmated best friends' as my personal headcanon for this fic because Itachi is very young, but there's no hint of anything skeevy to contradict that)

Dirt and Ashes, or: The One-and-a-Half Body Problem - Tozette - 90000 words (Complete)

The invasion of Konoha during the chuunin exam didn't fail. Team seven is broken, people are dead, and Sakura is hurt and frightened and a very long way from home.

Alternative summary: In which Sakura carries half of Hidan across two countries, leaving a trail of blood, bodies, and other people's legs.

This fic is long, fantastic, and complete. It's also super gory, gross, strangely heartwarming, and a 100% gen Sakura-focused fic. That's finished. It's so incredibly satisfying.

Kill Your Heroes - Evil Is A Relative Term - 167000 words (WIP)

Because, sometimes, we are what our adversaries make of us. Because Gatō only needed Zabuza to neutralize Kakashi. He isn't afraid of one little pink-haired genin. But even mice will bite when cornered. A story of where fear drives the most vulnerable member of Team Seven, from Wave and beyond.

This fic is...well, it's hard to sum up. It starts slightly choppy thanks to the structure imposed by what I'm guessing was a prompt meme, but it's got a brutal story at its heart. Sakura runs into a lot of trouble on the Wave Mission, and starts to level up in both badass and fucked-up-ness. It is well written, and it isn't overwhelmingly grimdark.

Trial by Ninja - jacobk - 100000 words (Complete)

To become great, one must overcome great opponents. A moment of inspiration during the chuunin exam puts Sakura on the path to greatness, whether she likes it or not.

This fic is yet another Sakura fic (my eternal fav!), and very heavy on the Team 7 loyalty. Sakura beats Ino in the Chuunin exams, and gets trained by Ebisu. Things spiral away from canon from that point onward. In Naruto fandom you chew through a lot of "rehash of canon, ever so slightly different", but this one? This one is a very plausible canon AU where somethings stay the same, and others really don't. And it's complete!

I found it super enjoyable, and though the sequel, Appeal of Authority, hasn't been updated in over a year, I'm still clinging to hope.

Beauty+Stupid by Laylah - 2527 words (Complete)

He moves like a damn dancer. Kisame wonders how many people have lost fights with the Uchiha because all that pretty made them stupid.

Itachi/Kisame. Itachi fisting Kisame. It's hot. REALLY hot.

Payback by penny - 1937 Words (Complete)

Summary: The first time they fuck, they're both drunk. Anko has vague memories of a dare, a strong memory of Iruka blushing, and a vivid memory of the way he'd moaned when he went down on her, like he was the one on the receiving end of all the attention. It...sticks with her, makes her notice Iruka.

Anko/Iruka fic with het bloodplay! It's not terribly long, but I like the very ninja romance they strike up.

A Snake In the Grass, a Wolf At the Door by blackkat - 56000 Words (Complete)

Summary: Orochimaru is on the edge of breaking when someone unexpected pulls him back to solid ground. When the time comes, he returns the favor.

Sakumo Hatake/Orochimaru! This is woobie fic. Orochimaru woobie fic. It is delightful, weird, and very, very woobie.
(Totally shipping it)

A rec note: this is pure id fic, and it's been doing the opposite of growing on me over time. However, if it sounds like something you might like, then there's no harm in giving it a read!

survival of the fittest by cywscross - 24700 words (complete)

Sakura is thirteen, still a Genin, lost in the middle of Earth Country, lugging an unconscious Chuunin around, and so far beyond scared that she’s moved right on to pissed off.

The lightest of Sakura/Shikamaru shipping! This one is a really great survival story, where everything that can go wrong absolutely does. Sometimes twice. I love how plotty this fic manages to be!

Yet, mad I am not By: Erisah Mae - Words 76532 (WIP)

...and very surely I do not dream"- Poe. Uchiha Itachi died. Then he woke up chained in a cell, in a Sound stronghold. Having fought his way free, he encounters some people he knew were dead, and some who when previously met have tried to kill him on sight, but now show concern. Is this an elaborate genjutsu? Or something else?

Canon Itachi gets tossed into a dimension where his crapsack life was not, in fact, crapsack at all. This fic is pretty entertaining! Primarily for Itachi walking through a world where everyone he thought was dead is alive, and desperately trying to pretend he's the Itachi who belonged in this world, while having no clue what that Itachi was like. (He screws up. Repeatedly. It's both sad and funny)

A Female Switch by randomlydrabbling - 9278 Words (Complete)

Gai is born a girl, and absolutely nothing changes.

What it says on the tin! An overview of Gai and Kakashi's relationship if Gai had been born a girl. They are BFFs. They are...not lovers? It's still totally Gai/Kakashi fic, though.
(Dub-con underaged sex mentioned, not detailed)

Ascendant By Samurai101 - 115000 Words (Complete)

Summary: Itachi's just died...and woken up thirteen again. The only problem is his thirteen year-old self doesn't like the idea of sharing his mind and body with his clan's killer. How hard would you fight to save your family from yourself? ::AU::COMPLETE::

Oh this fic... Where do I begin? It's long, it's complete, and it's a despair party from beginning to about ten seconds before the end. I can't think of many fics with such a excellent feeling of swiftly impending doom--reading this fic is like watching the Titanic go on its maiden voyage.

Troubling New Developments by SicTransitGloria - 2149 words (complete)

Kakashi takes a moment to wrap his mind around equating Ino’s chest with enemy shinobi while Asuma begins beating his head against the table and groaning about how he didn’t sign up for this. Rated for language and the general horror that is puberty

The jounin-sensei of the Konoha twelve vs. puberty. It's been nine years since I first read this, but rereading it, I blame it fully for my addiction to well-meaning, yet utterly godawful at mentoring Kakashi.

A Thoughtful, Moving Exploration of Passionate Youth - thehoyden - 15400 Words (Complete)

It said something about Gai that Iruka was actually unsure whether that was a line.

Iruka/Gai, in a world where Iruka adopted Naruto when Naruto was six. This fic is soft, dreamy, and super sweet. It's very romantic, surprisingly subdued for something that features Gai, and all round just lovely. This is honestly one of my favourite fics of all time, in any fandom.

Pulling my Weight - itsthechocopuff - 71000 words (WIP)

During their mission to Wave, Sakura realises how behind she is in her training and decides to do something about it. She vows to become a teammate Naruto and Sasuke can depend on, can respect, can trust to fight their battles alongside them. But Sakura has always been a paper-ninja, so her first stop for inspiration is the library where she finds unexpected help in the form of one very bored tokujo who quickly goes on to become an integral part of her life. Soon, despite the neglect of her sensei and all odds seemingly against her, Sakura's destiny begins to change.

Sakura gets some training by Genma, and it makes all the difference. (Sakura power-up fic--my greatest weakness!) This one makes use of a lot of minor characters (who, admittedly, may be...overly impressed with Sakura, but that's why it's fun, right?).

A Consequence of Loyalty - leathansparrow - 52590 words (Complete)

On a mission into Rain country, Itachi encounters a very large man in a red and black cloak who tells him: “I’ve only ever seen one person use crows as you do.”

He cannot take the man’s further advice: “turn back now, if you value your life.”

Everything changes.

A non-massacre au.

In which Itachi doesn't kill his family, and they hate him for it (okay, it's more complicated than that). Eventual Itachi/Kisame/Shisui, though it's a very minor part of the fic.

This is a honestly a great fic. The mystery unravels slowly and satisfyingly, there's a lovely sense of weighty doom, and it has my OTP in it. it's well written. And complete, we mustn't forget that it's complete!

Uneasy coexistence by DeGlace - 70000 words (complete)

One grinning shark–man. One pink–haired medic. Ankles. Teeth. Kisame x Sakura. Yes, you read that right

Kisame/Sakura! It's a cheerfully goofy romance between two of my all time favorite characters. It's fun! And both long and complete.

Reflection by JapaneseAnimeFreak16 - 44000 words (WIP)

His nose itches with the long dead scents of incense, saltwater, and spice but he doesn’t look back until -
A choked, “Kakashi?”

He closes his uncovered eye, takes a deep breath, and turns.

Three ghosts stare back.

In this world, Team Minato returns as heroes.

(This time, there was no disgraced Hatake runt carrying the most prized doujutsu of the famed Uchiha clan, no questions of theft or accusations of treason, no doubts of Minato’s abilities as a teacher let alone Hokage, no back-stabbing comrade killers-

-no Kakashi.)

Canon Kakashi falls into a new dimension where he died in Obito's place. And almost everyone he ever cared about is alive instead of dead. To be very clear, this is a Canon Kakashi from a point before he finds out about Obito being still alive.

What I love about these alternate dimension type fics is the character's (and reader's) discoveries of the little changes that added up. This fic makes very good use of that, and great use of Kakashi's building fear that maybe--just maybe--he should have died.

The First Shifting Grain by CADEL - 79700 words (WIP)

Sabaku no Gaara lands in the past to a time where everyone fears him and his father is still alive. He realises regaining everyone's trust will be difficult, especially when they still think he's a blood-thirsty psychopath.

Time Travel fic for Gaara! I fear the fic might be dead, but nearly 80000 words is nothing to sniff at. Gaara heading back in time is always a bit sad, because, well, the whole childhood as an unpredictable spree killer thing (Naruto plot elements: never having to say you're joking), which this fic takes some time to explore.

Gallant by Crunchysunrises- 14800 words (complete)

On the day that he makes genin, Itachi sees Sakura. It changes the course of his life.

This one is a quiet and sweet story, focused on a weird little friendship that springs up between tiny Itachi and baby Sakura. The friendship eventually saves Itachi, though he's not really capable of wanting to be saved.

It's got an equally good sequel, which I'm very fond of for the cast of very young Naruto characters it features. Very cute!

Just the Usual Habits by mapplepie - 4100 words (complete)

Summary: Sakumo has no idea where all of these habits of Kakashi's are coming from. In which five-year-old Kakashi forgets the existence of his left eye, loses his ability to lie believably, and is a little too knowledgeable about the Birds and Bees. Still, no matter what oddities went on in Kakashi's head, one thing is certain – the boy will always love his father, through thick and thin.

Time traveling Kakashi is such a little brat.

Looking In (On the Outside) by Killaurey - 9000 words (complete)

Ino's never been good at doing nothing. Being ordered to do nothing doesn't make it any easier. (Minor InoNaru.)

So I waffled around in Killaurey's list of fics for about two days, trying to decide with was the absolute best one to rec, so that everyone could see how excellent her lightly creepy touch on Naruto canon is.

The answer is all of them. Read this one, go to her profile page, read all the rest. Killaurey is fucking fantastic. She focuses heavily on Sakura and Ino, with a side dish of Kakashi/Sakura. But damn, it's her Sakura/Ino platonic soulmates writing that steals the cake.

Deathless by phoenixyfriend - 17500 words (WIP)

Mortality is for losers. So is time as a linear concept. In other words, the entire planet is dead, Sakura is over five hundred years old, and she's bored as hell. Time-travel is clearly the only option.

It's manically cheerful crack about time traveling super-powered Sakura. It's like my personal kryptonite. This isn't to say that the fic is great--it's batshit. But it has some good moments that I really enjoyed.

Sky on Fire I: Slow Burn by Killaurey - 247600 Words (WIP)

AU after the Sasuke Retrieval Arc. Inocentric. Shikamaru didn’t choose her for the mission because she was weak. Furious at him, and at herself, Ino decided to change that – but sometimes change is a bumpy road to walk.

Have you ever wanted Ino deciding to get stronger fic? Have you ever wanted epic length Ino gets stronger fic? And have you ever prayed to the fic gods that you could have both those things, with clear, well written prose, and a large background cast that gets a lot of attention?

If you're anything like me, you didn't even know you wanted any of those things until you found this fic, saw the summary, and froze like a deer in the headlights of love at first sight.
This fic is good. This fic is really good. And long. And unfortunately incomplete and possibly unlikely to be finished. But it's very worth reading.

now, for the second act by WDW - 26900 words (WIP)

Summary: After his death at Pein's hands, Kakashi finally makes his peace with his father. But when he opens his eyes, it's not to the the ruins of his village. Instead, he's thirteen again, armed with all the knowledge he has of the future and the skill set of a thirty year old ex-ANBU Commander. He's ready to save his precious people.
Except, he's not the only one to make it back.
[Team Minato wakes up in the past after their deaths, a week before the mission to Kannabi Bridge. Yes, all of them.]

But she wasn't sure how to put those pieces together to make some explanation that fit. It wasn't as if she could say, "Well, actually, our whole team just came back from the future. Apparently, Kakashi is just a very weird adult."
"Oh, the challenge with Gai?" Obito asks. Rin slumps in relief. "I dunno. He's been like that for years."
She curses under her breath.
Genma blinks. "You're kidding me," he says flatly. "That was not normal."
Obito shrugs. "Maybe you didn't notice," he offers. "Kakashi always acts like that. I mean, Rin and I are his teammates. We do know him the best after all."
"Didn't you call him an asshole and an arrogant jerk?" The other boy asks skeptically.
"People change."
"You said that yesterday."
Obito nods. His poker face is perfect.
This fic is weird and quirky and has a novel premise for time travel! I LOVE the idea of Minato's entire team time traveling. It's not finished, but what is there is a good read, and it had a few points that had me laughing out loud.

About Face by wroth_and_ruin - 61900 words (WIP)

Summary: A little yellow-haired boy saves Sakura from the bullies. And everything changes.

I love these kinds of fics. Sakura gets saved from bullies by a totally different blonde. Naruto gets a BFF. It's cutesy, a little twee, and 100% adorable (these are features, not flaws!). :D

Damn the Consequences by notbug (KageKashu) - 1000 Words (complete)

Summary: Madara is tired, and he isn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.
It's short but well written, and the idea is very interesting. Time Travel!

How Long is Forever? by aoutrance - 98000 word (WIP)

Summary: Time Travel AU. Sakura has come back to do good deeds and fix some shit. Not posted in chronological order.

Sakura Time Travel fic! Now, if you haven't already clicked through and started reading, let me start with hell yes I love Sakura in this. It's a fun, well-written fic, where Sakura is...well she's a little tiny bit bored being a child. This changes some stuff.

It ends on a cliffhanger, and it hasn't updated in a year, but hey--it's still a great fic!

To Teach You (Nothing Like A Zombie Apocalypse) by Tozette 7100 Words (complete)

Summary: Hidan’s plans for today have changed from make it home and take a nap to choose which way to die is least shitty. Since he’s contemplating it anyway, he’s pretty sure he’d prefer the explosion to the fall, but he’s still open to alternatives that, you know, don’t involve dying.

It's a modern AU where Akatsuki is trying to survive a zombie apocalypse. It's a great one shot, with lots of action and tons of fascinating hints about the situation that Akatuski has found itself in, and it's satisfyingly complete.

(I would read another 200000 words of this, but that's just me being greedy. ;)

Teamwork: A Teacher's Guide by Tozette - 16000 words (WIP)

Summary: In which Kakashi decides that Team Seven would have been just fine, and avoided a lot of future problems if they'd been more closely-knit, trusted each other more, and cooperated as a team. He goes back in time to fix it.

Kakashi doesn't have a great history with interpersonal relationships. But speaking from years of wartime experience, Kakashi knows that there is one thing that can unite a group of people like no other: shared trauma.

Okay, you guys might have guessed this already, but I really love time travel. Also, here's a quote from it that I love:

Kakashi left the clock on the wall next to the photograph of his old team where it ticked like some maddening sound track to his ongoing time travel catastrophe. It wasn’t entirely comforting to have it there.

Tozette has a real gift for characterization (and actually writing in general) and this is a very, very Kakashi story. Kakashi's a total failboat who is determined to do it all by himself, and, well, he doesn't do too terribly well at it. He is very hindered by his critical lack of social skills.

Late Night Awkward by Bittersweet Mika 6100 Words - Complete

Summary: Sakura can’t sleep, and Kakashi just can’t escape his students. Awkward situations and revealing conversations abound. Not to mention some realizations about themselves and each other

Okay, first things first: Sakura is 13 in this, and though it isn't shippy, it is distinctly pre-shippy.

Second thing, this is horribly, hilariously awkward, and it fired up my Kakasaku shipping soul back when I was a very young fan.

Third thing? There's two completed sequels to this one shot, and they are also terrifically awkward.

Xylophilia by Crunchysunrises - 4400 Words (complete)

Kakashi is Tenzo's first love. Sakura and Sai are his final ones.

I'm not entirely sure what to say about this fic except--well, pure squee, obviously, but more importantly, I adore the little snippets of Tenzo's life, and how he goes from lost to found over the course of the story. Sakura's deep appreciation for his powers is quite nice, too.

Boy, Reborn by Ouvalyrin 9000 Words (Complete)

Summary: Sasuke dies.

Holy shit so creepy. So creepy. This gave me the greatest shivers.

Vespertine by: Cynchick - 115000 Words (complete)

Two enemies strike a bargain to save what they both hold dear. He will reveal a truth that shakes her beliefs, drawing her into a web of lies and betrayal. She will offer the redemption for which he never hoped and show him how to be human again. ItaSaku.

Sakura/Itachi fic that is both long and good. I've reread this fic many times, and though Sakura is, perhaps, not quite as badass as I like her (look, I like my Super!Sakura), it's one of my favourite fics of all time. I hope you enjoy it too!

Felix Culpa by Ninjagrrl - 30800 words (complete)

Summary: The felix culpa, or blessed fall. An attack from the Kyuubi leaves Itachi blind, his mind shattered and memories gone. Meanwhile, Kakashi is still recovering from the aftermath of a mission gone badly wrong.

I'm not going to lie, this fic is so subtle that I'm not entirely sure what happened before, during, or after it, but it makes up for that in sheer atmosphere. It had a lot of atmosphere. Oodles of it. And it is distinctly not hurt/comfort.

Warning: possible underage torture/violence. ...It's very subtle, but I'm pretty sure it was in there?

How To Save The World With No One Even Realizing by IncompleteSentanc (Erava) - 27000 words (Complete)

Summary: Minato knows at the beginning of the week that it's going to be a hellish one. Mostly because it starts with the kidnapping of one of his two remaining students, only a year after they'd lost his third one. He just doesn't realize at the time that it's not going to be a hellish week - it's going to be hell for quite a bit longer than that.

It all starts with Rin's kidnapping, and her subsequent rescue at the hands of a mysteriously appearing, monstrously strong, murderously violent woman.

A woman with cotton candy pink hair.

It only devolves from there.

This is a set of outsider point of views on the whole time-travel to fix everything trope. Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto are scary.

There's also a 40000 word completed sequel to this fic! Don't read the sequel first, it makes no sense by itself (okay, okay, I got like halfway through the sequel before going "this fic is good, but I have no idea what's going on", and scrolling up to find out that oops, not the first fic in the series)

Black Sheep Verse: Now is the Winter of Our Discontent by Cywscross (16 parts, WIP)

Summary: “You can stay with me,” Orochimaru offers on impulse, which isn’t like him at all. But Minato and Kushina’s boy is staring back at him now with heartbreakingly hopeful eyes set in a too thin face, and he can’t bring himself to walk away.

An Orochimaru who never left Konoha takes in tiny Naruto. It's super cute!

Unexpected Guests by Asuka Kureru (Askerian) - 2000 words (complete)

Summary: It's snowing and Kakashi is determined to spend his vacation day alone and not!brooding. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura disagree. Post hypothetical end of manga, might be some vague spoilers.

An old fic, but one that's chock full of really good Team 7 feels.

Control by Reimar (Complete)

Summary: The improper way to return a prodigal teammate to your side.

Sakura/Naruto - This is fucked up, but also great. (But fucked up). You should definitely read it!

split knuckles by agavrik - 4957 Words (Complete)

she will bring down a god for them and carve her name out into this world with her bare hands. sasusaku-ish.

The one where Sakura anihilates Madara. Shhhh, it's beautiful. 😢

like a stray to the arms that were open by Laylah - 2720 words (complete)

"It's a jutsu Tsunade developed—"
"Of course it is."

"—to help medi-nins direct chakra through their patients' bodies in traumatic situations, and how are you even lucid." She glares at him.

"I'm pretty sure I'm not," Kakashi says helpfully. "So I gladly consign my dubious virtue to your talented hands."

Sakura/Kakashi futanari healing cock! Full disclosure, this was written for me as a late gift for Smut Swap, and I am so happy I could die. It's amazing. I might be crying a little, but they're good tears. Not weird tears at all.

if the shoe fits - by Searching.For.Enadi - 12500 words (complete)

Summary: Time travel. Technically, she could consider this the greatest mission she has ever undertaken, or a brilliant opportunity to finally hit the hot springs. (Or, the one where Haruno Sakura really, really needs a vacation).

I laughed frequently and hard at this one. Sakura goes back in time, takes up bounty hunting, wood carving, and painting.

The Lavender Beast of Konoha by Mark Doherty - 42800 words (WIP)

Summary: In a fit of hubris, Hiashi forced Hinata to attend the same Academy class as Neji. Having never been in the same class as Naruto, who shall serve as her inspiration to grow stronger? AU Team Gai: Lee, Tenten, Hinata. Gen for now. Surprisingly not crack.

I'm not usually bothered by WIPs--I like the journey, and if we don't make it to end, well at least I had some fun on the way, right? I'd rather read 1000 incomplete words than read nothing.

Yeah, not for this fic. Gai is so good for Hinata in this fic, and the story has stuck with me like a burr since I read it back in 2010. I want the rest like burning, even though there's no chance after all these years. But it's still one of my favourite Hinata fics of all time--even if the incompleteness on this one really hurts me. :P

Gentle, and low by rilina - 400 words (complete)

Summary: How can someone who admires Uzumaki Naruto of all people not know how to shout?

A character study piece for Hinata that I very much enjoy.

Something in the Water by Maldoror (Complete)

Summary: Tsunade does some digging.

This is short and funny, and I want to read the aftermath so bad.

In Bond and Blood by thehoyden - 12918 Words (complete)

Summary: "I want to make Naruto my heir," Kakashi said bluntly.

Kakashi/Iruka! This fic is delightful in all the best ways. A marriage of convenience for Iruka and Kakashi (predicatably) blossoms into more!

The Chase by Hokuto - 14500 words (complete)

Summary: A mysterious noise in the middle of the night sends Itachi and Shisui on a mission with unforeseeable consequences. Vague spoilers for all currently released chapters.

It's such a good mystery/mission fic. I don't want to spoil it for you, but this fic hurts so good. You should definitely read it!

Rice Paper by greenkangaroo - 877 words (complete)

If you leave a secret in the box just outside their compound's back door, an Akimichi will eat it, written on rice paper.

This fic hits hard. Very good, do recommend.

What Even - greenkangaroo - 4349 words (complete)

One of the logistical problems of moving back into a village you abandoned (per orders) after murdering everyone in your family (per orders) and leaving your little brother all alone to grow up with a massive sibling-sized chip on his shoulder (definitely NOT per orders) is that when everything is said and done and you move back in, there’s just too much space. Or, Itachi's lucky the Akimichi are easygoing and Kisame is just confused.

The ending I have always wanted for Itachi and Kisame.

The Wall by greenkangaroo - 992 words (complete)

It's rare for an Akimichi to be the last survivor of a trio.

I'm not crying, you're crying. This is a great exploration of the Akimichi clan's role in Konoha, and it kind of makes me want a billion fics about them.

White Snakes and Rusted Kunai by Tartarun 12200 words (complete)

The white haired boy was laughing. "Guess we can't ignore the prodigy child any longer." In which Orochimaru learns first hand how cruel and unwelcoming the ninja world can be, especially to outsiders.

Orochimaru. Not quite canon compliant, but very, very good.

Housekeeping - Anria - complete

Summary: Shikamaru runs into a ghost

The season for ghost stories is upon us! Also, I adore ghost stories, especially quiet, non-scary ones like this.

I Love The Sound of You Walking Away by Quillslinger -2916 words (complete)

Summary: Look out, Konoha. Yamanaka Ino is on the rebound. Ino-centric, het and yuri.

This fic really captures a great version of Ino.

a heap of details, uncatalogued, illogical by 100demons - 8459 Words (complete)

“Oh,” she says, white hands clenched into tight fists. “I’m-- I was your student. Haruno Sakura.”
Kakashi tilts his head, gray eye analyzing her carefully for tells. He finds nothing. “I’ve never seen you before in my life,” he says flatly.

(Kakashi wakes up fourteen years old.)

I think my favourite part of this is Naruto's scrapbooking hobby. But it's also a really great fic for the Kakashi h/c! (he's such a prickly little shit).

disgraceful - Joosetta

I'm reccing this for Naruto's birthday because if he had a favourite fanfic I swear it would be this one.
It'd be his secret favourite, printed out and hidden under his bed.

Cold Comfort - sowell - 1594 words (complete)

Summary: Everyone has their own way of grieving.

Kakashi/Sakura...there's very few things I love more than ill-advised grief sex. If you're like me in that regard, you will adore this fic!

An Invincible Summer by ShanaStoryteller - 136306 words (complete)

Summary: When Naruto is five, he's gutted by a drunken civilian and presumed dead.

Six months later a girl with ash pale hair and dark blue eyes enters the Academy.

Naruto/Sasuke! This fic is beautiful. I avoided it for so long because the summary sounded like an ocean of fics that I've back-buttoned out of, but this one is different. Special. Take my word for it. (To be fair, it makes some wild-ass use of canon, but there is a frantic, brilliant energy to this fic that I means I would not change a single weird as fuck word of it)

open season by sazzafraz - 7773 words (complete)

Summary: The way Sasuke comes home is less myth and more devastatingly embarrassing happenstance.

Sakura/Sasuke/Naruto...Kakashi? Well this was an awesome read. I love Sakura's attitude in this. She's so prickly and vicious and tempermental and sentimental. Her grudge against Sasuke is brilliant and deeply funny to me for some reason.

In which Itachi May Have a Sister Complex and Satsuki is Exasperated - okayserasera - 9914 words (complete)

Summary: Satsuki is five years old, eyes wide and pitchy-black like those of the baby seals Itachi has seen in the islands of Kiri, when she smiles sweetly and asks her beloved Big Brother the best way to kill a man. Itachi puts down his stick of dango, nods approvingly, and tells her that the best way to kill a man is a senbon to the internal jugular artery in the place where a man’s neck meets the underside of his chin.

Bless this hilarious fic. Bless it hard. Insane Uchiha, and ninja as they were meant to be--batshit.

Goal-Oriented By: Emerald Ashes - 4837 words (complete)

Summary: After defeating his evil older brother, Sasuke decides to return to Konoha and rebuild his clan...Why is everyone being so difficult about this? In which Sasuke completely missed the plot.

I'm just going to call this one the one where Sasuke is a spectacular failboat at remembering anything but 'Kill Itachi' and 'Restart clan'. Lol. Sasuke.

Throwing a Stone In a River by theroadkillcafe - 10000 words (WIP)

Summary: When Sakura graduates from the academy, she suddenly finds her head invaded by the ghost of Uchiha Shisui. Her inner is gone, but not forgotten, and she struggles with impulse control more than ever before. But also, Shisui gives a lot of unsolicited advice - useful and otherwise - and does not shut the fuck up. He’s not thrilled about current events.

This fic is super promising. I love how Sakura deals with it and hides him, and why she doesn't report the new voice in her head. It makes perfect sense, and I'm very curious about what Kakashi is thinking about her. And I really want to know what happened to Inner Sakura.

...Very curious. I've been thinking about this one off and on for a couple of days now, trying to figure out what could happen next.

mornelithe_falconsbane: (pic#11705038)
2017-05-29 12:28 pm
Entry tags:

Nonconathon Letter

This is still a placeholder letter. I'll get actual prompts out by Monday, but until then, it's safe to assume that I like my non-con like I like my coffee: in every possible configuration from black to tiramisu. It is my favourite trope ever, and you would have to try very hard to make me not like it.

This hasn't been a placeholder in weeks. Shit. I completely forgot to delete that bit. My bad?

Modern or Mundane AUs
First and second person POV
Character bashing
Animal abuse (Doesn't include Don't Starve. Or bestiality, for that matter)
Underage with characters under 13
Betrayal of partners/teammates/friends (unless canonical...or requested)

Stuff I always like:
The tags I requested! Feel free to use tag for any ship in any fandom
Canon AUs, for-want-of-a-nail, and time travel
Sex Pollen. 24/7 A-Okay, Yes, Please.
Violence, gore, mutilation, graphic torture, dehumanization
Unhappy endings, happy endings, unsettlingly weird endings
H/C, no H/C, H/c
Snuff, necrophilia, horror, body horror
Something made them do it
Ghost sex
Inanimate objects becoming animate and horny
Monsters, xeno, breeding
Public use/very public violation
Rescue fic


Naruto! I love these idiot ninja and their tragic backstories a ridiculous amount. The found family and teamwork narratives are absolutely one of my favourite things in it. I love the unquestioning loyalty that should really be questioned, sacrificing themselves for their team...yes indeed. Naruto is iddy as fuck.

And I mean, it's not canon that they do prostitution missions, but no one says they don't! And then there's always losing a fight, or a mislaid bouquet of fuck-flowers, or someone's weird bloodlimit.
Naruto Requests )

One Piece

I love One Piece for most of the same reasons that I do Naruto (found family, teamwork, bonds that are stronger than blood, unlikely heroes, heartbreaking backstories that get handed out like convention swag), but also the logical and internally consistent plotlines and the unbelievably cool worldbuilding.

Since this is nonconathon, though, I'm here for the abuse of authority and pretty boys getting fucked up. :D
One Piece Requests )

Don't Starve

How much do I suck at Don't Starve...?

I never have made it through a full year. That having been said, it's one of my absolute favourite games. Ever. I adore the art style (which is why this one's for fanfic and fanart!), and the crippling tension of knowing there could be a warg coming at any time. The sanity meter and the hallucinations, the creepy darkness (Charlie!), the way that any tiny change in the environment can mean perfect for keeping my playtime down to reasonable time blocks?

I die a lot. Very rarely from starving, but fairly often by tentacles. (Which I didn't nominate, omg, what's wrong with me).

My favourite part of every game (and the part that I am, by necessity, extremely good at) is the first week or so of setting up camp, finding food, materials, and buffer monsters to murder the wargs for you. I mean, if you want a time to set something. :P
Don't Starve requests )

One Punch Man

I love this canon for the very high quality of art and animation in the manga and the anime, and the undercurrent of sinister doings that laces all of the Hero Society bits. I love Saitama's utter lack of fucks, and Mumen Rider's surplus of fucks, and Genos' love-letter of fucks delivered daily to Saitama--okay, the metaphor is stretched too far. I love the characters, the art, the worldbuilding, and the plot.
One Punch Man Requests )

Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Between Beast and Robin Hood, I've very lucky that Disney didn't end up making me into a furry. Which is to say that Beast is hot, and he should fuck Belle into next week., I'm very into the xeno/bestiality aspect of the ship, and the size difference. And even though I didn't pick fanart here, I really wish I had.
Beauty and the Beast requests )

Yuri!!! on Ice

Okay, so I'm on episode 10 as of this moment (I'll be done it by reveals, obviously), and this show is a fucking delightful barrage of hot guys being very into each other, and filled with so much sweetness that I pause it every six seconds to send screencaps to the person who got me into it. Seriously, it's hilarious and super cute, and I love it.

Which is why I want only the most vicious and brutal noncon fic for it! Though also dirty-bad-wrong betrayal non-con. <3. And sex pollen. Also non-violent noncon that's super creepy.
Yuri!!! on Ice requests )
mornelithe_falconsbane: (Default)
2017-02-21 11:07 am
Entry tags:

Smut Swap 2017

Hey writer! I like the tags I picked. All of them. Individually and together. You write your favourite of my tags, and you know it'll be one of mine. Anon comments should be on if you want some clarification on anything.

Hey artist! Same goes, but you know that I really love in art? Size kink, stomach bulge, tentacles, monsters, and extreme penetration. :P

If you don’t like my prompts, but do like something I list here, I welcome mixing and matching my list of likes, tags, and prompts to all of the pairings I’ve requested.


Modern or Mundane AUs
First and second person POV
Character Bashing
Animal abuse. Makes me cry, please don't.

Kinks I DNW: Infantilism, Daddy/Mommy Kink, Vore, Formal Dom/Sub, Pony Play, Puppy Play, Consensual Roleplay, Foot Fetishes

-Sex pollen. I fucking love sex pollen.
-the canon setting and world
-Time travel
-friends with benefits
-casual sex with friends
-characters being happily in love
-hate sex that’s secretly like-sex
-touch starvation
-ghost stories (ghooooost seeeeeeex)
-creepy stories
-rape, dub-con
-rape recovery (especially with healing cock)
-breeding (not pregnancy, the impregnating. Pregnancy fine, but not hot)
-stranded in snow storm/desert island/inside a whale/in a box
-strangers meeting, having sex, and then discovering that they’re enemies or rivals
-exhausted, worked-down-to-the-bone characters getting some TLC
-lavish descriptions of beddings
-sex for warmth
-mind control that gets broken eventually
-healing cock (both the parody of magical healing cock and the earnest ‘heal your trauma with a dick’ variety)
-cracky scenarios developed solely for porn. Futanari as an STD? Yes, please.
-unexpected gender swap
-body swap
-rough sex
-graphic torture
-body horror
-Sex slaves (non-consensual)


Prompt 1

Medium: Fanart, Medium: Fanfiction
Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage, Major Character Death
Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Haruno Sakura/Hoshigaki Kisame/Uchiha Itachi
Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi/Yamanaka Ino
Hatake Sakumo/Haruno Sakura
Haruno Sakura/Hatake Kakashi
Haruno Sakura/Yamanaka Ino
Hoshigaki Kisame/Orochimaru

Group Soulbonds, Gangbang, Sex as a Teambuilding Exercise, Double Penetration in One Hole, Were-cock (growing a cock on the night of the full moon), Sexual Mad Science, Healing Sex, Magical Healing/Resurrecting Cock, Sex Pollen, Ghost Sex, Somebody's Genitalia Just Got An Upgrade, Gender or Sex Swap, Enemies With Benefits, Redemption Sex, Rival Sex, Size Kink, Femdom, Seduction, Drunk Sex, Fisting

Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, dead, impregnated, or given bonus clones to make the tag work.

General prompts/stuff I like:
- Ninja teaming up to seduce a hard target
- Tactical seduction for fun and profit
- Drunk sex (especially if they wake up married! Or pregnant with puppies. Or with brand new genitals. Drunk mad science is the best mad science.)
- Sakura or Ino is infected with the dreaded mooncock disease. Means she grows a (massive) cock during the full moon, and she lusts for holes to stick it in
- Sex Pollen. Forever and always.
- Hurt/Comfort

- Sakura loves Ino. Ino loves Sakura. They both really want to sleep with a guy, though, just to see what it's like. And Kakashi's rumoured to be fantastic in bed. He's so confused. And embarrassed. (I'm not opposed to them deciding that they like him and want to keep him!)
- Sakura and Ino fighting over which of them is the better seductress using Kakashi as their target, while Kakashi plays hard to get and enjoys himself immensely. Eventually they have to use teamwork to seduce him! (Because let's be real, if there's anything that's going to seduce Kakashi, it's teamwork).

- Kisame needs a medic, so Itachi kidnaps the Hokage's apprentice. Unfortunately, he kidnaps Sakura while she's harvesting the rare and very potent Sex Weed, and drags her to their camp before he realizes what that weird feeling in his dick is. Fortunately (or maybe not) Sakura is well-versed in healing sex.
- Sakura ends up haunted by Itachi and Kisame. Everyone can see their ghosts, which is a textbook sign of an unfulfilled soulbond. Her choices are clear--fuck them back to life, or let them fade. (The choice she makes should be fucking them back to life, if you're curious)

- Sakura's bored, so she gives the Impure World Rebirth Jutsu a try. Only she doesn't include a target or a sacrifice, and ends up with a very startled ghost who's been waiting in the spirit world to chat with his son for nearly twenty years. And no way to get rid of him, because he's bound to her soul. GHOST SEX WOULD BE GOOD. Ghost sex that turns into living person sex as fucking Sakura floods Sakumo with life, also good.

- Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura just can't seem to get the vital synergy needed for the true power of teamwork. Reluctantly, Kakashi turns to an old training method for aligning chakra energies: Team orgies. Unfortunately, he forgot Naruto's ninja way: "Anything worth doing is worth doing a couple dozen times, with clones." But he never ever knew about Inner Sakura, so that part can hardly be blamed on him.
- Accidental group soulbond. They were trying to bring Sasuke back, but now he's in their heads, and they're in his, and he's still in Sound. Which means that Sasuke, Sakura, and Naruto can see right into Kakashi's super fucked up fantasies about the three of them beating him in a fight and then raping him with clones. And Kakashi, Sasuke, and Naruto all suddenly realize that Sakura is a seething ball of repressed lust and rage who likes pain. Her own, other people's, it's all good. And that Naruto has literally fucked himself, fucked himself as a girl, gangbanged himself while male and female, and once turned himself into a girl in order to get a very drunk Jiraiya to fuck him. And Sasuke really wants Orochimaru to fuck him. (These are all suggestions that I welcome you to change. I'm mostly thinking "Group soulbond, turns out that they all have super fucked up fantasies, and they can't even fake being appalled at each other's fantasies because they're actually turned on. And then they fuck.")

- Sakura moves in with Kakashi when her apartment's pipes crack. Kakashi considers protesting, but never quite gets around to it. He only has one bed, but she's right when she says teammates share.
- Breeding for the village. Kakashi's thinking of retiring, and the Hokage would really like him to retire into parenthood. Sakura is single enough, right? (Post-canon or post-canon AU where Sasuke/Sakura wasn't a thing, your choice).

- The real reason I wanted were-cock and fisting! I love drunk sex, one up manship during sex, improbable insertions, and chakra used to pornographic effect for these two.

- Orochimaru is fascinated by Kisame's gills. And claspers.
- No Massacre AU - Orochimaru wants to do some stamina tests (he says. Kisame's pretty sure he's not taking notes). Kisame wants a new partner (he says. Orochimaru's pretty sure he doesn't mean it.)

Prompt 2

Medium: Fanfiction
Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Hatake Sakumo/Orochimaru

Drinking Games, Shapeshifting Seducer, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Self-Sacrifice/Enduring Rape to Protect Friend/Lover/Family, Sex for Warmth, Sex Pollen, Drunk Sex, Drugged Sex, Marriage of Convenience, Group Soulbonds, Accidental Soul Bond, Accidental Marriage, Gang Rape, Femdom, Make Up/Reconciliation Sex, Mpreg, Sex Bets, Coercion by Identity Deception

- I like creeper amoral Orochimaru who earnestly loves Jiraiya and Tsunade and is willing to do anything--up to and including using shapeshifting, 'accidentally' soulbonding himself to them, marriage, bearing their children, and drinking games that lead to the previous four--to get them back into Konoha after they leave. (Hey, they left for kids, right? They'd come back for more kids! Their kids. Their kids that he implanted into himself without telling anyone.) Obviously, the ideal scenario here is that he succeeds, and gets his teammates back, and into his bed. And maybe typing him down and fucking him stupid as repayment for manipulating them like that.
- Confused and drunk Jiraiya who can't quite shake the feeling that there's something really, really familiar about this whore (The whore is Tsunade, and also not a whore, but is definitely seducing Jiraiya because she's really lonely and he's easy) and also that the walls seem to be moving (the walls are Orochimaru, who is also very lonely). Or Orochimaru and Tsunade could both be pretending to be prostitutes to seduce Jiraiya, and just coincidentally picking the same night to do it.
-Tsunade, Orochimaru, and Jiraiya are all married to each other. Multiple times over, in multiple countries. All of them insist that it's totally meaningless, but they utterly refuse to get divorced. They only have fantastic threesome sex when they've been drinking or it's really cold outside, and that's only because Orochimaru is unbelievably bitchy in the cold. It's not like they're married-married, so it's totally not weird that they're getting hitched again.

- Tsunade, who always seems to have money, in spite of losing every bet she's ever made (the money is Orochimaru--lol, no, I'm joking). The money is from healing random Konoha ninja she runs into, 95% of whom are Orochimaru and whatever team he's on. Somehow, no one is never bleeding when Orochimaru tracks her down and pays her a month's salary to heal a sprained ankle. Very coincidence. She always insists that he spends the night so she can ensure he's healing properly. By fucking him. (If you want to write this as happening after the end of the Orochimaru/OMCs plot, I will be filled with glee forever.)

- Orochimaru gets stuck on a mission with Sakumo, who is nice and all, but obviously not Tsunade or Jiraiya. Temperatures plummet, Orochimaru takes a long fall into a shallow stream of ice-cold water, and Sakumo warms him up from the inside out (by fucking him, in case that wasn't clear).
- Sakumo gets dosed with some kind of super-strong sex pollen, and Orochimaru begrudgingly offers his body to help Sakumo through it. And by begrudgingly, I mean that Orochimaru is secretly super eager and trying to hide it...or maybe that he really, really doesn't want to, but he endures and eventually enjoys it. I like both. Both are good!
- Jiraiya asks Orochimaru to keep an eye on Sakumo because he's worried that Sakumo might do something stupid. Orochimaru treats the request like an infiltration mission.

- The first thing Orochimaru does after he goes missing-nin is hunt down Jiraiya, drag him somewhere no one will find them, and beg him to fuck him. Or sex pollen. Or both sex pollen and begging to be fucked!
- Jiraiya tells Orochimaru that he's pretty. Orochimaru likes being told that he's pretty

Prompt 3

Medium: Fanfiction
Orochimaru/Original Male Character(s)
Gang Rape, Rough Sex, Self-Sacrifice/Enduring Rape to Protect Friend/Lover/Family, Torture, Sex Pollen

- Orochimaru getting gangraped by original male characters in order to protect his teammates
- Orochimaru offers his body for Tsunade or Jiraiya's safety
- Orochimaru was gang raped and tortured during the first war, and then spent decades trying to replicate the experience until he gave up and went back in time to relive it for real. Bonus points for murdering his rapists at the end.

One Piece

Medium: Fanart, Medium: Fanfiction
Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, No Archive Warnings Apply
Dracule Mihawk/Portgas D. Ace
Dracule Mihawk/Perona/Roronoa Zoro

Ghost Sex, Prison Sex, Bodyswap, Stranded Sex, Sex for Warmth, Captivity, Accidental Soul Bond, Caretaking, Comfort Sex, gratitude sex, Rescue Sex, Fisting, Fucklicking, Trapped in a Small Space, Magical Healing/Resurrecting Cock, Group Soulbonds, Bondage, Sex Pollen

Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, dead, impregnated, or given new genitals, to make the tag work.

- They have a threeway soul bond that necessitates them fucking. For the good of their souls.
-Mihawk decides to dress them better, because no students of his will ever be clad in polyester. The unexpected side effect of destroying their inferior clothes, though, is a severe clothing shortage on laundry day--as he discovers when he finds Zoro and Perona doing laundry naked.
-Perona and Zoro pay rent with their bodies. Mihawk suggested it to make them to leave him alone, and they took him way more seriously than he expected.
-The ten-year bloom of black roses happens while Mihawk is off island at a meeting with the World Government. When he returns, he finds Zoro and Perona sex-pollened out of their minds and desperate for his cock.
-Mihawk makes Zoro get on his knees and eat Perona out while he fucks her.
- Ghost sex. Perona's ghosts can induce lust instead of depression. And Perona likes to use them on Zoro while Mihawk is watching, just to watch him squirm--which she gets away with until one of her ghosts misses and hits Mihawk instead.

- Ace's tiny ship capsizes, and he can't pull himself up--Luckily, Mihawk finds him and saves his life. Which Ace expresses much gratitude for, using the medium of sexual favours. On Mihawk's also tiny ship.
- The World Government decides that Mihawk is insufficiently loyal and toss him into Impel Down, directly across from Ace. Prison sex, prison rape, rescue sex, or escaping from Impel Down and being free celebration sex?
- Mihawk has no idea why Portgas D. Ace is sex-haunting him, but he can't help but notice that Ace grows more solid every time they fuck

One-Punch Man

Medium: Fanfiction
Mumen Rider | License-less Rider/Saitama

Self-Sacrifice/Enduring Rape to Protect Friend/Lover/Family, Gang Rape, Fisting, Raped by Monsters, Rape & Rescue, Stomach Bulge, Come Inflation, Bruises, Tentacles, Size Kink, Xeno, Double Penetration in One Hole, Outdoor Sex, Sex Pollen, Knotting, Person Thinks They Can't Say No To Sex

Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, dead, impregnated, or given bonus clones to make the tag work.

- When Saitama was training, he ran into a pack of monsterous beasts that were too strong for him to defeat.
- The reason Genos lived through his village being destroyed is because the Cyborg wanted to fuck him. Or his village was destroyed by a rampaging pack of tentacle beasts.
- Mumen Rider doesn't back down, even when he really should. And by the time he thinks to run, it's much too late.
- Mumen Rider is determined to protect the citizens, even if it means sacrificing his body. Publicly, while the people he's trying to save film it on their phones.
- Sonic is hunting Saitama when he is caught by wolf-monsters that want to make him their bitch.

I think the list of prompts is pretty indicative of what I'd be delighted to receive for Monsters/Any. The plot can be non-existent, I'm here for monster rape. If you want to end it with whatever character it is killing all of the monsters, being rescued, abandoned because the monsters get bored, or becoming the monster's sex slave permanently, all of those are great endings.

Mumen Rider/Saitama
- Mumen Rider is very grateful to Saitama, which is why he he agrees to let Saitama fuck him. Saitama's not in his right mind when he asks, though. (Sex pollen, bruises, person thinks they can't say no?).
- Saitama saves Mumen Rider from the Any/Monster prompts above, and discovers Mumen Rider is still affected by their sex pollen abilities, even though he's already fucked raw and leaking monster come. Saitama tries to satisfy Mumen Rider with his fingers, but he keeps begging for more. (Fisting!)
- Saitama leaves Mumen Rider covered in bruises when they fuck.

Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Medium: Fanart, Medium: Fanfiction

Knotting, Rape, Anal Training, Xeno, Breeding Kink, Come Inflation, Cages, Captivity, Sex With Prisoner, Sex Toys, Bestiality, Non-Consensual Bestiality, Bondage, Chains, Non-Human Genitalia

Look, this is a blatant excuse for the filthiest porn imaginable starring the Beast.

Not Adam, Beast. Furry, inhuman Beast.

Gaston came after Belle alone and Beast stuck him in the dungeon where he becomes their sex toy? Yes.
Belle as Beast's willing and enthusiastic breeding bitch? Yes.
Gaston as Beast's reluctant and crying breeding bitch? Yes.
Belle training Gaston to please Beast? Yes.
Beast's (enormous) bestial cock knotting Belle to him while Gaston watches from a cage in the corner of their bedroom? Yes.
And then after he's finished with her, he fucks Gaston while Belle watches? And they force Gaston to lick his come out of her? Yeah. That sounds good too.

Give me filth.

Original Work

Prompt 1

Medium: Fanfiction
Paladin/Evil God
Male Dragon Shapeshifter/Male Dragon Rider
Prince/Tavern Patrons

Gangbang, Gang Rape, Size Kink, Large Cock, Sex Magic, Come Inflation, Stomach Bulge, Gender or Sex Swap, Rape, Tentacles, Xeno, Shapeshifting, Knotting, Double Penetration in One Hole, Anal Fisting, Anal Gaping, Size Difference, Public Use, sex slaves

Rape? And then more rape. This is a non-consensual request all the way down. Though some of the prompts are consensual-ish, and I'm totally okay with any interpretation of them, it's a hard sell to label any of them as consensual. If gender isn't specified, feel free to pick.

Okay, I'm not sure any of these really need prompts or anything like that, but here's a few thoughts.

- Human merchant trips into Orc's pit trap, has to agree to trade their body for a hand up
- Orc slave bought by size queen Human
- Gladiator vs. Gladiator, loser gets fucked by winner in the ring before being tied down for the audience's use

- Fleeing an arranged marriage with a red-headed viking, Damsel Robin Loxsley heads into the dark forest with her dowry in tow. As night falls, though, she runs into a magnificent specimen of a red-headed highwayman (...and his crew?), who demands her bags, dress, and body. (Feel free to switch genders as you please)
- There's a savage band of highwaymen about, and the Sheriff is determined to catch them. Unfortunately, one of them find him/her first.
- The leader of the Lumberjack Anarchists never expected to run into the mysterious thief that stole his/her mother's magic axe, much less find them atoning for their crimes in the Plaza of Punishment (with their body! Public use.)

Male Dragon Shapeshifter/Male Dragon Rider
- The heat comes unexpectedly, when they are far away from the queen's neutralizing pheromones. To prevent a rampage, the rider must submit.
- The rider has forced the dragon into its weakest form and bound him in it. To tame a dragon, one must ride a dragon.
- Dragons pick their riders from the ones who survive the first mating
(feel free to add monster cock of any variety to this one)

Paladin/Evil God
- The paladin is the temple's annual sacrifice to Droga of Many Cocks. Trained since childhood to defeat him, he/she is nevertheless terrified to enter the Phallus Temple and battle the God of All Dicks.
- The paladin has not slept in many days, haunted by terrifying dreams of a monster that wants inside them. But no one can keep from sleeping forever.
- The evil god has been imprisoned for many, many years in a bottle displayed prominently in the Temple's relic room. The paladin is kind of clumsy.

- The king isn't going to pay them for their services. He sent his least favourite son to tell them that.
- The prince must retake the throne from his uncle, but the mercenaries are unwilling to work for free. Luckily for him, he's a very pretty prince.
- The coup d'etat was successful, and as a reward to the hardworking mercenaries who made it so, the new king gives them the freshly enslaved children of the previous king, naked and bound in chains.

Prince/Tavern Patrons
- This kingdom's version of Townhall Meetings involves the ruler's children being sent to drinking houses for the use of the citizens. The prince just turned (16, 17, 18, 19, your choice), and it's finally his turn to provide open and honest service to the citizens he will one day rule.
- The prince sneaks out at night, disguising himself as a poor commoner to see how the other side lives. Or at least, how the spoiled only child of a king thinks a commoner dresses, as interpreted through a wardrobe of the finest fabrics and tailoring. He is recognized immediately, and plied with booze. Lots of booze. So much that he's only semi-conscious when the tavern patrons start stealing his fine clothes.

Prompt 2

Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Medium: Fanfiction

Desert Nomad/Oasis Spirit
Sex Magic, Magical Healing/Resurrecting Cock, Healing Sex, Tentacles, Aphrodisiacs, Sex Pollen, Bestiality, Xeno, Rape & Rescue, Raped by Monsters, gratitude sex, Fucked Raw, Come Inflation, Object Penetration, Stomach Bulge, Fisting, Bathing/Washing, Bottoming Out, Bondage, Alternate Universe - Dark Fantasy

The Desert Nomad/Oasis Spirit has been sparking my interest since I first saw it. That's why it's getting a special prompt all by itself.

Ideally, the Desert Nomad is human-shaped, and the Oasis Spirit is either vaguely monstrous or exerts control over the water of the oasis that allows it to make fuck-doubles/monsters/a plethora of cocks/tentacles to fuck the Desert Nomad with.

And they...fuck the Desert Nomad? I'm a little shaky on plot here. And unsure if any is needed.

-The Nomad is a former slave, and nearly dead from dehydration, the Oasis Spirit injects them with fluids to rehydrate them.
- Desert Nomad just got robbed, raped, and left for dead--maybe even actually dead!--when the Oasis Spirit wakes up and decides they want to fuck them back to life.
- The Nomad is just really, really lost.
- The pack of demons/bandits picked the wrong oasis to drag their prey to.

Prompt 3

Medium: Fanfiction
No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con

Original Couple/Their Bed Come to Life to Fuck Them
Male Character/Animated Bed
Female Character/Animated Bed

Furniture Coming to Life and Fucking People, Size Kink, Bondage, Stomach Bulge, Tentacles

The bed comes to life and fucks him, her, or them. Pillows writhe against their skin, sheets tie them down, mattress springs surge up like padded tentacles to fuck them, and the pillow cases squirm free from the pillows to gag them.

Full set of tags I prompted for Smut Swap:
Feel free to use any of them anywhere.
Group SoulbondsRapeBondageRival SexSex for WarmthSex Bets
Somebody's Genitalia Just Got An UpgradeNon-Consensual BestialityFriends With BenefitsRape & RescueMake Up/Reconciliation SexSex With Prisoner
Self-Sacrifice/Enduring Rape to Protect Friend/Lover/FamilyShapeshiftingAccidental MarriageBreeding KinkHealing Sexsex slaves
XenoShapeshifting SeducerRedemption SexNon-Human GenitaliaCagesDrugged Sex
KnottingAccidental Soul BondRaped by MonstersSex MagicSize DifferenceCoercion by Identity Deception
BestialityRough SexSex PollenAnal FistingMpregGhost Sex
GangbangSize KinkChainsFemdomMagical Healing/Resurrecting CockSex Toys
Drinking GamesSex as a Teambuilding ExerciseLarge CockTentaclesSeductionMarriage of Convenience
Gang RapeEnemies With BenefitsFriends to LoversSexual Mad ScienceBruises 
Furniture Coming to Life and Fucking PeopleFistingTorturePerson Thinks They Can't Say No To SexCaptivity 
Gender or Sex SwapOutdoor SexStomach BulgeCome InflationPublic Use 
Double Penetration in One HoleAnal TrainingWere-cock (growing a cock on the night of the full moon)Anal GapingDrunk Sex 
mornelithe_falconsbane: (Default)
2016-09-14 03:38 pm
Entry tags:

Trick or Treat Letter!

If you don’t like my prompts for a character or ship, but do like them pinned to another character or ship I've requested, feel free to mix and match.

You don't have to exactly match a prompt, write me a full story with a beginning, middle, and end, or draw a perfect picture to make me happy. I like epics, drabbles, sketches and the Mona Lisa, and I like everything in between. If you think a prompt is cool, but you only want to write 300 words of what would be a 100000 word story if fully written, or you only want to sketch the beginning of an idea, please do!

  • AUs
  • First and second person POV
  • Character Bashing
  • Animal abuse. Makes me cry, please don't.
  • Issuefic
I like this stuff in art:
  • bright two or three colour palettes (like blue and green, purple and red, yellow and orange)
  • black and white
  • ink drawings? I’m not sure that’s the right term, but Inktober was a really enjoyable month for me on Tumblr.
  • comics (if I could be so lucky!)
  • characters dressed for battle and holding really large weapons
  • costume porn
  • scenery porn. I love fanart that makes use of landscapes--vast night skies, misty shores, foreboding forests, ocean sunsets, snowy mountains, golden sand dunes, tropical forests, gorgeous tall ships--it seems unfair to request this, but if you like doing it anyway and can work it in, I’ll love it
  • Size kink! I love it in fic, but it works so awesomely in art that it’s like my number #1 fanart favourite.

I like this stuff in fic:
  • the canon setting
  • Time travel
  • Peggy sues
  • humour
  • slice of life
  • friends with benefits
  • casual sex with friends
  • characters being happily in love
  • hate sex that’s secretly like-sex
  • touch starvation
  • ghost stories (ghooooost seeeeeeex)
  • creepy stories
  • rape, dub-con, rape recovery (especially with healing cock)
  • Hurt/Comfort
  • stranded in snow storm/desert island/inside a whale/in a box
  • exhausted, worked-down-to-the-bone characters getting some TLC
  • lavish descriptions of beddings
  • sex for warmth
  • graphic torture
  • mind control
  • healing cock (both the parody of magical healing cock and the earnest ‘heal your trauma with a dick’ variety)
  • Sex pollen. I fucking love sex pollen.
  • cracky scenarios developed solely for porn. Futanari as an STD? Yes, please.
  • body swap


Trick or Treat
Fic or Art
Kakashi, Sakura, Itachi, Ino, Temari, Orochimaru, Sakumo, Kisame,

I especially love ghost stories, hurt/comfort for exhaustion or hunger, winter/snow storms, mysteries, resurrections, time travel, and deserts.

General Prompts: time travel, missions, winter, ghosts, lanterns, hunger, teammates, hands
General Treat Prompts: soulmates, exhaustion and sleep, homecoming, benevolent/helpful ghosts, warmth, resurrection, dogs
General Trick Prompts: angry ghosts, dying alone, soulmates, coming back wrong, crossing the moral event horizon, interrogation, torture, mutilation, madness, loss of self

Character Specific Prompts:

  • Split personality
  • Haunted by Sasuke's ghost (while he's still alive)
  • Crushing her enemies with iron fists
  • Leatherworking for fun and profit
  • Crushing on Tsunade
  • The first time she feels competent
  • Hunger
  • Stitches
  • Haunted.
  • Slowly driven mad by regrets
  • Soulbonded to an enemy
  • Slavery/Enslaved
  • Taking up crafting
  • Becoming a medic-nin with Sakura
  • The Hokage's desk
  • Sleeping under a blanket of nindogs
  •  Dying and existing to regret it
  • Captured by the enemy
  • Wolf shapeshifter
  • Saved at the last second
  • A litter of fuzzy puppies
  • Stuck inside with Kakashi on a snowy day
  • Betraying his village
  • Inhuman monster
  • He's a useful tool
  • Chained down and broken
  • Death by dehydration
  • Mail-order tea sampler kits
  • Soulmates
  • He didn't expect Akatsuki to involve so many teahouses
  • Soulmates
  • coming out of madness | redemption
  • they caught him when he tried to escape, and crippled him to keep him from trying again
  • the spirit of scientific inquiry
  • getting himself pregnant for reasons
  • he writes his teammates letters
  • Her little brother is a monster.
  • She hears echoes of voices in the wind
  • Her fan is possessed by an evil spirit
  • Being Gaara's first real friend after the chuunin exam
  • Dying slowly, choking on all of his regrets
  • The night before the massacre
  • Haunted by the Uchiha ghosts
  • Cuddling a litter of kittens and a chance to rest
  • Kindness where he least expected it
  • Stuck in someone's mind
  • Inconvenient telepathy
  • Breaking the enemy
  • Saving Asuma
  • Accidental body swap
  • Teamwork: the porno
  • Sleepovers

Favourite Ships:
You could ship any of the characters I've requested with each other and I would be delighted. Yes, any of them, and yes--that's a challenge (write or draw Kisame/Orochimaru, I dare you)

  • Competitive seduction
  • At the next Chuunin exam they fight for first place and set a new record for property damage
  • Caught in a cave in a snow storm
  • Everyone knows they're soulmates except them
  • No one believes that they're soulmates except them
  • Moving in together as 'roommates' (the funny thing is that they meant it at the time)
  • The mission that became a village legend
  • They would, could, and do walk through fire for each other
  • Kakashi's down for the count, but Sakura's got this
  • Drinking contest
  • Sakura keeps borrowing his dogs
  • Kakashi dies in her arms; five seconds later she brings him back
  • Wearing each other's clothes
  • Captured and extremely dangerous
  • Seduction on a mission
  • Kakashi knows his soulmate is a Mist Nin, and refuses to know any more than that
  • Kisame's ghost haunts Kakashi
  • Kisame abandons his village to find his soulmate (his soulmate is five years old)
  • Itachi trusts Kisame with an absentminded casualness that blows Kisame away
  • Kisame feeds Itachi chakra and blood to keep him alive
  • One of them survives, the other haunts them
  • Cuddling in a freezing rainstorm
Orochimaru/Anyone - Horror or fluff, sweet or fucked up. I have serious Orochimaru cravings right now.
  • He steals their blood and keeps it in a vial, ready to clone them if they dare to die
  • Orochimaru doesn't think he's capable of love until he falls headfirst into
Sakumo/Orochimaru - The crack ship is sailing, and I'm on board.
  • Sakumo is in the middle of a suicidal depression when he's assigned to guard--and spy on--Orochimaru
  • Sakumo saves a seventeen-year-old Orochimaru, and Orochimaru never forgets

One Piece

Trick or Treat
Fic or Art
Zoro, Mihawk, Perona, Luffy, Nami, Ace

I especially love ghost stories, hurt comfort for exhaustion or hunger, winter/snow storms, mysteries, resurrections, time travel, and deserts.

General Prompts: winter, autumn, ghosts, lanterns, hunger, crew, hands, ship-wrecked, s
General Treat Prompts: soulmates, exhaustion and sleep, homecoming, benevolent/helpful ghosts, warmth, resurrection, healing, freedom, ship cats, fishing, found family
General Trick Prompts: angry ghosts, dying alone, soulmates, coming back wrong, executions, interrogation, torture, disasters, bleeding, regrets, inferno, the 'devil' in devil fruit is literal, captivity, body horror, surgery

Character Specific Prompts:
  • Raising his hopeless teenagers to be very dangerous pirates
  • He's under mind control
  • His last fight
  • Stuck on the Thousand Sunny
  • Blacklisted
  • Father's Day
  • He's a vampire (literally)
  • The islands are moving
  • Map-making
  • Being Luffy's
  • Slitting Arlong's throat
  • Their attempt to break her made her stronger
  • Calling down lightning
  • Weather Witch (literally)
  • The devil is in the details
  • Seastone collars
  • A cat named Adventure
  • He never had a tangerine before Nami joined the crew
  • Heroes aren't him
  • Haunted by Ace
Perona - Ghoooooooooooooosts. Okay, now add more ghosts.
  • Mihawk and Zoro are the closest she's ever felt to normal
  • Her shadow is her own--mostly
  • One of her ghosts kills someone
  • Her ghosts show her people's greatest regrets/disappointments/shame
  • She catches a cold and finds Mihawk and Zoro to be helicopter nursemaids
  • She's pretty sure she's dead
  • Ghosts
  • Freedom was another word for nothing left to lose (He didn't realize he had something to lose until he lost it)
  • becoming Whitebeard's son
  • his first love
  • Impel Down
  • The fire is hard to control at first
  • He likes pain a little too much
  • Two years later he wakes up absolutely starving (zombie, vampire, incubus, or human, your choice).
  • Protecting his people
  • Magically turned into a tiger
  • He's afraid of being lost
  • Something's wrong with his body
  • The first time he cuts through seastone
  • He's a tiger shapeshifter

Favourite Ships:
You could ship any of the characters I've requested with each other and I would be delighted. Yes, any of them, and yes, that's a challenge (Luffy/Mihawk? <i>Nami</i>/Mihawk? I'd like to see it, tbh). These are just...additional suggestions that can be mixed and matched to any pairing.

Mihawk/Perona -
  • Ghost sex, ghost voyeurism, ghost possession
  • Or Perona protecting Mihawk / Mihawk protecting her
  • Sharing a bottle of wine
  • Perona is very good at stitches
  • Guiding him to the Thousand Sunny
  • Sharing a bottle of wine, a bed, or a bath
  • One or both are virgins
  • Zoro's tongue is very, very strong
  • Romantic advice from Mihawk
  • (ghooooooosts)

  • They're soulmates. All three of them.
  • Tying one of them down and fucking them all night
  • The castle is haunted (not by Perona)
  • Mihawk returns from a trip with an injury
  • Zoro gets lost, the other two find him
  • The bond between comrades (fuck buddies)
  • Nami wants him to cut her
  • Zoro likes her scars
  • Drinking after midnight
  • Semi-public sex
  • Cuddling for comfort and warmth
  • Zoro gets lost on an island, Nami finds him
  • A chance encounter on the Grandline
  • Ace's boat capsized, and he can't get out of the water enough to put it right side up
  • Mihawk loses his position as a Warlord, is imprisoned in Impel Down, frees Ace as a distraction, and they end up successfully fleeing together

Corruption of Champions

Fic or Art
Male Champion, Female Champion, Arian

General Prompts: angry ghosts, dying alone, body horror, exhaustion, growing new body parts, eggs, unholy pregnancies, lost, winter, lanterns, hunger, will o' wisps, hermaphrodites

You can't go too far with this. Anything in the game is fair to take, and take further.

  • He wanted the champion to like him, so he never said no. Not even when he wanted to
  • The champion offers him out to interested parties/takes him adventuring to distract the enemies
  • The champion turns him into a hypersexualized caricature of himself and lets the entire camp use him as a convenient fuckhole
  • The champion is huge. Like really, really huge.
Male Champion
  • Body horror. The champion becoming corrupted, twisted, and strange, and as he does, he cares less and less.
  • Saying yes to the sand witch
  • Any of the bad ends
  • Becoming a hermaphrodite
  • "What the fuck am I pregnant with now?" - Old Champion Saying
Female Champion
  • Any of the bad ends
  • "What the fuck am I pregnant with now?" - Old Champion Saying
  • With corruption comes hunger
  • Looking for tentacle monsters in the woods
  • Fucking the minotaurs
Give me something really fucked up. Please?
mornelithe_falconsbane: (Outrage)
2016-02-23 09:27 pm
Entry tags:


If you don’t like my prompts, but do like something I list here, I welcome mixing and matching my list of likes, tags, and prompts to basically all the pairings I’ve prompted.

I am way more interested in getting fic or art that you find really hot and fun than fic or art you did to exactly match a prompt I gave.

100% of my pairings and tags are good for art or fic, and I will consider myself incredibly lucky to have either. ;)

Final Note: I do want all of the things I've prompted below pretty equally. Mad Max and One Piece are longest because I did them first, not because I want them most (also, I wanted so many potential pairings!). Naruto is an itch that can be sated with essentially the same scenarios over and over (sex pollen, clone sex, forced to breed, that kind of thing--I am a simple soul at heart), and Haven I love, but only really wanted one pairing for.

-First and second person POV
-Character Bashing
-Permanent Mutilation
-Characters discussing consent at length prior to sex / safe words / really formal dominance and submission stuff. Not my kink. (Like, if there's 500 words of characters discussing permutations of their potential future sex, hell no. An exchange like: "Hey--you wanna--?" "Yes!" is perfectly fine)

I like this stuff in fic and art:
-the canon setting
-Time travel
-Peggy sues
-slice of life
-friends with benefits
-casual sex with friends
-characters being happily in love
-hate sex that’s secretly like-sex
-touch starvation (where appropriate)
-ghost stories (ghooooost seeeeeeex)
-creepy stories
-rape, dub-con
-rape recovery (especially with healing cock)
-breeding (not pregnancy, the impregnating. Pregnancy fine, but not hot)
-stranded in snow storm/desert island/inside a whale/in a box
-strangers meeting, having sex, and then discovering that they’re enemies or rivals
-exhausted, worked-down-to-the-bone characters getting some TLC
-lavish descriptions of beddings
-sex for warmth
-graphic torture
-mind control that gets broken eventually
-healing cock (both the parody of magical healing cock and the earnest ‘heal your trauma with a dick’ variety)
-Sex pollen. I fucking love sex pollen.
-cracky scenarios developed solely for porn. Futanari as an STD? Yes, please.
-unexpected gender swap
-body swap

I like this stuff in art:
-Size kink! I love it in fic, but it works so awesomely in art that it’s like my number #1 fanart favorite. Includes come inflation, large cocks, large objects, large sex toys, fisting, and size difference.
-bright colour palettes
-sepia colour palettes
-ink drawings? I’m not sure that’s the right term, but Inktober was a really enjoyable month for me on Tumblr.
-comics (if I could be so lucky!)
-I don't know if post-sex cuddling or post-sex mutual contemplative naked ceiling watching is smutty enough, but I definitely like that kind of art.
-Scenery porn (One Piece and Mad Max in exquisitely dramatic natural settings. Naruto and Haven has the opportunity for the same. I love fanart that makes use of that--vast night skies, misty shores, foreboding forests, badass cars, ocean sunsets, snowy mountains, golden sand dunes, tropical forests, gorgeous tall ships--it seems unfair to request this in a smut swap, but if you like doing it anyway and can work it in, I’ll love it)



Tags: Developing Relationship, Comfort Sex, Quiet Sex, Sex for Warmth, Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen, Bets & Wagers, Friends to Lovers, Lazy/Gentle Sex, Size Difference, Size Kink, Sex Toys

Duke Crocker/Dwight Hendrickson - Not going to lie to you, my primary desire here is Duke/Someone Who is Nice to Him. Also, Dwight is both super steady and ridiculously attractive. I love Nathan and Audrey (please don't villainize them!), but sometimes I just want Duke to get some nice, uncomplicated affection. And Dwight to get human contact on a more personal level than he usually allows.

I see them as being sort-of-friends who fall into bed because they're craving something uncomplicated, and then have surprising fantastic sex. Or Duke flirting a bit aimlessly because his life has fallen to shit (pick any point in canon!), and being surprised and intrigued when Dwight flirts back. Also, there's a giant back tattoo and issues with the Guard if you want to bring in clothed sex and secret-keeping. :D

-Dwight gets stuck on Duke's boat for a week because of a trouble, and boredom poker devolved into boredom sex that ended up surprisingly affectionate.
-Duke gets lost in the woods, and then found by Dwight. And he's cold. Really cold. He definitely needs to be warmed up with Dwight's massive (and gorgeous) body.
-Sex pollen trouble, Dwight's the first one infected and Duke helps him out.
-Duke falls out of the barn into Dwight's bed. Or van. Or the bed that Dwight keeps in the back of his van. Or really anywhere close to Dwight where Dwight is the first one to find him.

Mad Max:

Immortan Joe/Max Rockatansky
The Splendid Angharad/Max Rockatansky
Nux/Max Rockatansky
Max Rockatansky/War Boy(s)
The Organic Mechanic/Max Rockatansky
The Splendid Angharad/Capable (Mad Max)

Gang Rape
Size Kink
Nipple/Breast Play
Sex for Warmth
Sexual Dysfunction
Sex Toys
Object Insertion
Medical Kink
Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen
Dream Sex
healing cock
Non-Consensual Voyeurism
Gun Kink
Come Inflation

Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, impregnated, or given bonus clones to make the tags make sense.

Additionally, any individual section of a prompt is fine on its own or in combination with the rest of it. I do not expect you to do every sub-tag of a prompt.

My chief request is to make it filthy, creepy, angsty, weird, funny, violent, or hot. Max Mad isn't a canon I want fluff from.

Max/Warboys - When he's captured!
--punitive gangbangs?
--Or drugging him into liking it. (sex pollen!)
--Max unwillingly liking being touched because it's been so long, but the Warboys being incapable of gentle, and also seeing Max as a thing for them to fuck.
--Fists, objects, dildos made out of old tires, double penetration, size kink

Nux/Warboys - How about Nux getting punished for his failures as a warboy? (With Gangrape!)
--Or rewarded for his successes! (With Gangbangs!)
--If you're going to do this during canon I'm pretty sure the wives end up recaptured, so if you want them watching, A+ (Non-consensual voyeurism!)
--Max could be right next to him and getting gangbanged too. (Max/Warboys!)
--fists, objects, wrenches, dildos, object insertion, double penetration, more than double, size kink

Nux/Max - Max has a new ghost, and that ghost is a kinky slut. I tragically forgot to nominate ghost sex, so we're going with dream sex here.
--Slightly creepy dead Nux in Max's dreams (dream sex!)
--Nux is so cold and he just wants Max to warm him up (sex for warmth!), and Max wakes up each night feeling colder and colder--
--or Max actually successfully fucks Nux to life in dreams! (healing cock? In dreams!)
--ooooor in real life. If Max is hallucinating Nux's ghost while fucking Nux's fresh corpse (or mummified corpse) that he then healing cocks into vitality...that actually sounds awesome. (Healing cock, necrophilia, dream sex?)

Prior to canon Max runs into Nux and Slit on the war path, and Slit misses a jump and gets lost fairly early on. Nux catches up and then they fuck
--on the hood of Max's car
--because they drove into a toxic waste spill that sex pollens them into needing to (sex pollen!)
--Max forces Nux face-down over the hood of his car and fucks him with a shotgun/pistol (gun kink!)
--Because Max can't get aroused even though he's desperately hot for it (sexual dysfunction!)
--Nux thinking that they're having fun, Max thinking that he's forcing Nux into it (Rape! or dub con. One of the two.)
--Fisting? Or finger fucking. (fisting! Or fingerfucking)
--Max escapes, only to get caught by a larger band of war boys a couple of weeks later. He keeps waiting for Nux to recognize him, but Nux never got a good look at him.

The Organic Mechanic/Max - Genitals Ok? Organic Mechanic is a man of science, and he'd never write such a thing without checking! (Rape! And Torture!)
--by giving Max a really invasive exam (medical kink!)
--trying to arouse him and failing (sexual dysfunction! Lol. Of a sort. Looking for the humiliation of Max not wanting to be aroused, but also ashamed of not being able to get hard.)
--sex pollening him into arousal anyway (sex pollen!)
--And fucking him! (Rape!)

Immortan Joe/Max - Max touched his wives. Max shouldn't have touched his wives.
--Max sacrificing himself so that the wives can get away!
--Max getting caught with the wives! (Non-consensual voyeurism)
--Furiosa's (and Nux's? And wives?) furious rescue, complete with the biker grannies! And, if you love me, the wives tag-team killing Joe with bolt cutters while everyone else is distracted.
--Max being tied across the hood of a car and being forced to deep throat a massive dildo until he's on the verge of passing out! (Sex toys! Breathplay! Rape!)
--Burned with things! (Torture!)
--And fucked with a massive dildo!
--Joe fucking Max himself!
--And resorting to his fist when he can't finish! (Fisting!)

Angharad/Max - ....everything I put for the Nux ghost one. All of it or any of it, right down to fucking her bloody corpse back to life as her ghost urges him on.
Also: Angharad lives! And when Max tries to get away, insists that he stay.
--so that she can ride him/he can fuck her (Breast play, fingerfucking)
--while not pregnant with the intention of him making her pregnant! (Breeding! Come inflation? :)
--while pregnant with the intention of pissing off Joe's ghost to the max (Anything consensual from the list, including voyeurism from all other wives+Furiosa, sex toys, object insertion, fisting, come inflation, come play)

Angharad/Capable - Capable dreams of Angharad (Dream sex)
--The wives' quarters get cold at night (sex for warmth)
--After Joe, there's always Angharad (Anything from the list of tags, including come play if you want to make it really fucked up, which would be great)
--Angharad loves Capable almost as much as she hates Joe (Anything)

Naruto: Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, impregnated, or given bonus clones to make the tag work.



Double Penetration in One Hole
Size Kink
Teacher-Student Relationship
Multiple Penetration
Group Soulbonds
Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen
healing cock
Cock Slut
Come Inflation
Sex With Prisoner
Dubious Consent
Something Made Them Do It

Okay, so first things first, what I want most for Naruto-verse is filthy, filthy porn involving at least one of the tags I've listed, for one of the pairings listed in the canon universe.

I like missions gone wrong, exhausted people getting enforced and supervised vacations that end in porn, tragic gay ninjas being forced to breed for the village, clone sex, the enemy ninja whose primary attack is sex pollen, the allied ninja whose primary attack is sex pollen, challenging mighty rivals to ever great feats of 'taking it'...

And clones! Shit, the world needs more Naruto clone porn the same way it needs water. It needs it to act as a major heat and carbon sink for global warming (totally verified. Trust me, would someone on the internet lie to you?).

Group soulbonds is a tag. And it's something I never knew how much I needed until AO3 auto-filled it while I was trying to prompt gangbangs. Bless who ever nominated it. Anyway, group soulbonds means more than two. Obviously. If there's a pairing you want to add a third to in order to give me group soulbonds, you have my eternal okay. All 2+ groups are fair game. Please, give me the magnificent crack fic of my dreams.

Okay, Pairings!

Sakura/Kakashi - My first OTP, and eternally my jam. Fuck I love these two. Age her up, or don't, I don't give a fuck (actually I give a half-fuck: don't age her down). Sakura rescuing Kakashi from devilishly evil torturers of some variety, and healing him with her cock? Futanari? :D

Breeding for the village. Kakashi's hitting retirement age, and the village (Hokage?) would really like him to retire into parenthood. Sakura is single enough, right? And she'll need a guy who can stay home with the kids. (Post-canon or post-canon AU where Sasuke/Sakura wasn't a thing, your choice).

Itachi/Kisame - So tragic. So potentially hilarious. Itachi was 13 with really poor coping skills, Kisame was a shark with a tragic past, how did their partnership ever manage to work out in the beginning? Personally I'm hoping you answer that questions with sex pollen, chock full of delicious guilt on both their parts. (If you want to make Itachi older, that's fair game). Or something made them do it. (Kisame=size kink, right?)

Sakura/Ino - The real reason I wanted futanari! And fisting! Make it filthy. I love rivals to lovers, one up manship during sex, improbable insertions, chakra used to pornographic effect. Or best friends striking out at the bar and going home with each other, and having messy drunk sex on a sofa!

Sakura/Kisame - Size. Kink.

Sex with Prisoner (with size kink), Kisame captured and kept as a medical oddity--his teeth regrow, and they'd really be able to reduce dental costs if they could figure that one out. Does he really like her? Or is he just trying to get free? And does Sakura truly want him, or is it all an elaborate interrogation technique? Neither knows, and that's why it's so excellent!

Sakura/Kakashi/Sasuke/Naruto - Group soulbond. Accidental. They were trying to bring Sasuke back, but now he's in their heads, and they're in his. And it makes them fuck. (Age them up past 12. I care a little this time ;). And Kakashi is wracked with guilt over fucking his students. Delicious guilt. To be fair, he's too lazy to actually fuck them, and mostly lies back and lets them do whatever they want to his body. Give me Naruto and Kakashi fucking Sakura while Sasuke writhes in the distance, refusing to come back to Konoha, but unable to block them out. Or anything. Anything is also good.

Sakura/Ino/Kakashi - Sakura and Ino fighting over which of them is the better seductress using Kakashi as their target, Kakashi playing hard to get and enjoying it immensely? Eventually they have to use teamwork to seduce him! (Because let's be real, if there's anything that's going to seduce Kakashi, it's teamwork). Or literally anything. The thought of this threesome is super exciting to me. Group soulbond potential!

Kakashi/Gai - Mission gone wrong, and now they're infected with sex pollen. And quarantined with the instruction to work it out between themselves.

Sakura/Tsunade - Femdom and fisting with some student/teacher in there? IDK, I really want this, but I'm having trouble picturing exactly what it'd look like (other than hot). Call it training, with Sakura hyper-aware that this isn't normal? And that the PSAs all say she should report this to the Hokage--but she can't and she doesn't want to.

Sakura/Sasuke - I really want femdom and pegging for these two. Like really, really bad. I like broken, not able to express his desires Sasuke, hungry for affection even as he scorns and fears it, and exasperated, not-in-love Sakura. Sasuke can't believe she doesn't love him anymore, prods it like a sore tooth until it feels like the hole where her love is supposed to be is bleeding. ...okay, too much scene setting, I'm not writing it!

Anything with femdom! ;D

One Piece:
Everything I’ve tagged can be applied to any pairing I've prompted, regardless if they'd have to be gender flipped, impregnated, or given bonus clones to make the tag work.

Prompt 1:
Aokiji | Kuzan/Portgas D. Ace
Dracule Mihawk/Roronoa Zoro
Akagami no Shanks | Red-Haired Shanks/Dracule Mihawk
Monkey D. Luffy/Silvers Rayleigh

Superpower Sex
Prison Sex
Size Kink
Size Difference
Sex Toys
healing cock
Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen
Double Penetration in One Hole
Psychological Torture
rape & recovery
Dubious Consent
Come Inflation
Mind Control
Comfort Sex
Ice Play

Prompt 2:
Monkey D. Luffy/Nami
Nami/Roronoa Zoro
Perona/Roronoa Zoro
Nami/Trafalgar D. Water Law

Public Sex
Superpower Sex
Size Kink
Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen
Come Inflation
Friends With Benefits
Friends to Lovers
Het Anal
Loss of Virginity
Sharing a Bed
Large Cock
Clothed Sex
Nipple/Breast Play

Prompt 3:
Dracule Mihawk/Perona/Roronoa Zoro

Double Penetration
Teacher-Student Relationship
Comfort Sex
Sex for Warmth
Role Reversal
Drug-Induced Sex/Sex Pollen
Sharing a Bed


I like everything in the tags both individually and in combination with each other, and I'm also super enthusiastic for any and all smut fic/art for these pairings. All prompts are intended as any/all options with regard to kinks. I love all One Piece characters, especially all the Strawhats, and I DNW character bashing.

Shanks/Mihawk - I adore this pairing! They are ridiculously cute in chapter 96, and I ship it hard. Kinks I'd particularly like for this one are rape and recovery, torture, sex pollen, sex toys, size kink, healing cock, mind control aftermath and recovery, comfort sex, and honestly, a really high level of h/c on either an emotional or physical level.

I like the idea that they don't see each other frequently, but they trust each other a lot, and a Mihawk who really, really likes Shanks, and grumpily denies it.

-Mihawk ends up in rough shape after running into a pirate or marine with some kind of devil fruit that allows them to mind control other people. He eventually murders them into smithereens, but only after at least a week (would not object to months!) of whatever torture/mind-breaking you want to write in. And then he goes to visit Shanks, and manages to be super prickly and defensive until Shanks wrangles him into some reassuring comfort sex.
(Mind control aftermath & recovery, rape and recovery, torture, sex pollen/drug-induced, sex toys, size kink if you want, or heading straight into (metaphorical) healing cock and comfort sex. Hurt or comfort or both are all good.)

-Shanks thinks of Mihawk as a barn cat. But a really large, human one who wanders in to get sex instead of food, before leaving as abruptly as he came. When Mihawk plants down and decides to steal 3/4ths of Shanks' bed for a week, Shanks knows something must be wrong.

Maybe Mihawk has fled Zoro and Perona and is sulking, or he's unhappy for some other reason (I'm okay with basically anything. And yes, this could be the other prompt from Shank's POV ;)

-Shanks visits Mihawk during the timeskip. Shanks tries to interrogate Zoro about Luffy, Perona tries to interrogate Shanks and crew about Moria, and Mihawk wishes Shanks would pay attention to him instead of the foolish children he's been saddled with. And that the foolish children would remember that he exists. (...any kinks? I'm really down with silly comfort sex here)

Aokiji/Ace or Kuzan/Ace - I'm not choosing these two only for their completely opposite power sets! They also both nap a lot. Similarities.

-There is a supremely hot comic where Aokiji interrogates prisoner Ace in Impel Down by way of fucking him over a table, while Ace is in chains. It's super out of character for Aokiji, but it is id candy to the nth degree. Size difference, size kink, sex toys, rape, dub-con, devil fruit-use in sex--all good.

-Timeskip fic where Ace lives and Kuzan still leaves the Marines. Maybe Whitebeard dies and Ace leaves his crew out of guilt. Anyway, they run into each other and have psuedo-anonymous sex where they pretend they don't recognize each other. Maybe one of them actually doesn't. Size difference, size kink, sex toys.

-Ace runs into Aokiji who has been shot with a seastone bullet or something and is clinging to a melting ice flow as he slowly stains it red. Ace decides to tow the ice flow to land because Aokiji doesn't fit on his tiny boat. And then decides not to take the bullet out. Smut where Ace is in control, or where Aokiji digs the bullet out himself and then ice bondages Ace and then fucks him with an overly large ice dildo while Ace squirms and tries to overcome Aokiji's overwhelming Haki.

Luffy/Rayleigh - So, uh...Rayleigh is smoking hot. And I have a thing for "you remind me of a dead person who I loved" sex.

-Comfort sex where Rayleigh thinks he's comforting Luffy over Ace, but it's a lot more mutual with Luffy comforting him over Roger and missed opportunities with Ace in the end. Wordlessly. With his body. Shhhh, just fuck the younger and alive edition of your captain, Silver Fox Rayleigh.

-Dub-con where one of them is unexpectedly super pushy and the other isn't quite on board with the idea! Of Luffy? Of Rayleigh? I could see it for both. Surprise me! \o/

-Sex Pollen. Accidental sex pollen or haki training with sex pollen? A test that Luffy fails so, so bad first try.

Mihawk/Zoro- All the kinks, please. All of them. I adore the power imbalance between them, the position it puts Zoro it, the potential for abuse--so good.

-Prostitution! Zoro's got to pay for those greatest swordsman lessons somehow, and Mihawk would prefer he did it on his back.

-Mihawk has issues about letting people close, but Zoro gets inside Mihawk's fuck-off barrier and Mihawk can't help himself--a massage here, a foot rub there, tying Zoro up and sucking him off, making him share Mihawk's bed because Mihawk only has two and Perona took the other know, minor abuses of power like that.

Nami/Luffy - I love this pairing! I like them with a minimum of angst, lots of mutual appreciation, and both of them being pretty casual about the relationship, but it maybe slowly deepening over time.

-There's not a lot of privacy on Going Merry/Thousand Sunny. Nami and Luffy make do frequently (Voyeurism or public sex! Come Inflation would be great if you're into that, too. Preferably super casual, them moving from making out to fucking in the corner at parties, or in the men's room, or on deck, doing it fully clothed except a few adjustments for access. Crew watching!)

-Nami's a thief at heart. She wants Luffy, so she takes him. (Anything you want to mix in--Looking for Nami taking the lead and seducing oblivious Luffy until he very suddenly gets it.)

-Luffy and Nami get stranded on Sex Pollen Island and enthusiastically bang it out in the very mutual understanding that they're friends, and friends help friends when friends both accidentally breathed in sex weed pollen. (sex pollen, size kink (Luffy can probably inflate his dick. Just saying.), come inflation, superpowers sex, and whatever else from the tags I prompted.)

Nami/Zoro - I love the fuck buddies dynamic for them, but also like friends to lovers. I like them more friendly than passionately in love, but also super hot for each other's bodies.

-Nami taking Zoro on surveying jobs to help map out the islands they visit, and also find secluded spots to fuck. Zoro likes to come inside her and then fingerfuck it back out of her. Nami likes it when he pounds her into the wall, or fucks her ass, worships her breasts with his mouth, or gets on his knees and licks his own come out of her pussy so that her panties will stay clean on the walk back.

-Zoro gets injured protecting Nami back in East Blue. She's really, really grateful that he helped--so grateful that she wants to let him fuck her. Unfortunately, Zoro is shy. (I love flustered Zoro.)

-Zoro gets hit with sex pollen right after Alabasta, and there's no way that Nami's going to let that untrustworthy Robin take care of her crew mate--especially not since she volunteered! Of course, when Chopper shoves her into the women's room with a jug of lube and she hears the door slam shut behind her, Nami might have second thoughts. But if she does, they're too late! Cream pies, epic length fucking, Zoro apologizing earnestly while Nami is trying super hard to hide how close she is, the jug getting good use, unexpected anal, one or both as virgins, all of their crewmates listening in/peeking, Robin whispering advice in Zoro or Nami's ears--pick any or all!

Perona/Zoro - I like their squabbling and fighting, and am very intrigued by the two year time skip they spent together.

-Mihawk is into austerity. He has three books, two of which are in a language neither Perona nor Zoro have ever seen, he's threatened to kill them if they drink his wine, and there's one chessboard that's missing the white pieces. Perona and Zoro are ridiculously bored by month two. So bored that they decide to play...uh...heterosexual chicken? Like gay chicken, but not gay. And since neither can back down from a challenge, it becomes a full-blown sexual encounter of the "ARE YOU GIVING IN YET?" variety as both secretly flail at how they absolutely have to win, but they're so embarrassed at what they're doing (I would not say no to both being virgins). And it goes way, way too far. Groping. Oral. Intense eye contact while slow penetration occurs. Pulling out and going for anal. Creampies. Unexpectedly athletic positions. Ghosts as sexual aids. Fisting Zoro while trying to get him to cave. Mihawk walking in. That kind of stuff.

-Zoro and Perona have to share a bed. Perona manages to kick him out for the first couple months, but then he demands that she either share or give him the bed, because his back's killing him or something (IDK, make it up). Turns out Zoro's a sleep cuddler, and from the length of his morning wood pressed against her ass, he's got a really, really big dick. Perona is unwillingly intrigued.

Nami/Law - Use Law's devil fruit. Please.

-Body swap them
-Have Law loan her his cock so she can fuck him with it--or so she can fuck herself with it.

Mihawk/Perona/Zoro - I ship these three hard. They're on their own because I ran out of room in my other two One Piece prompts, but they're also the OT3 of my heart. I tagged for some kinky stuff up there, but literally anything is my true request.

-Mihawk gets a minor injury (not life threatening) that affects his mobility somehow (broken wrist, bad ankle sprain dislocated shoulder, w/e), and he's surprised to find Zoro and Perona are very worried about him, and determined to ensure that he doesn't have to do anything until he's better. Though he'd appreciate it more if either one knew what they were doing, or if they ever stopped squabbling.

-Mihawk doesn't see why he should only train one when there's two, and so decides to train Perona. Perona likes it (and Mihawk) way more than she thought she would. He's pretty cute for an old guy. The bad news is that he can feel her ghosts watching him. The really bad news is that he lets her get away with it for a week of watching him and Zoro get changed, bathe, and sleep before he asks her what is it she finds so interesting.

-Mihawk dresses them better, because no students of his will ever be clad in polyester. The unexpected side effect of destroying their inferior clothes, though, is a severe clothing shortage on laundry day--as he discovers when he finds Zoro and Perona doing laundry naked.

-Perona and Zoro pay rent with their bodies. Mihawk suggested it as a joke, and they took him way more seriously than he expected.

-The ten-year bloom of black roses happens while Mihawk is off island at a meeting with the World Government. When he returns, he finds Zoro and Perona sex-pollened out of their minds and desperate for his cock help.

-Mihawk makes Zoro get on his knees and eat Perona out while he fucks her. (Fucklicking)

All prompts aside, what was Perona doing for two years? Why did Mihawk let them stay? Did he take them out on supply trips? On his tiny boat, and if so, how did that work? Did he buy them new clothes? Did they eat meals together, or sleep together? Did Mihawk's abandoned castle have heating or running water?